My husband and I have been together for 15 years (since we were 18yrs old)  We have one 13 yr old son, and Love each other very much.  My husband was severely molested as a small child, and abused by a woman daycare provider, who was also a close friend of his mother.  He has struggled with mental illnesses since the very beginning, and now at the age of 34 it is the worst I've seen.  Over the past 6 years he has been in the ER about 2 dozen times, and in the psych hospital 6 times.  It is very hard for him to not be triggered.  He has tried different meds over the years but to no avail.  I try my best to help him, but he puts a lot of pressure on me, and expects me to take everything that he dishes out.  He is either extremely happy, or God forbid, very depressed or aggressive.  The alcoholism is what he struggles with the most, and that leads to his suicide threats and attempts.  He is getting back into treatment, but when he is not getting help I am in constant fear.  I walk on eggshells trying not to upset him.  The smallest remark can send him into a frenzy.  He constantly thinks I am cheating on him, but has no proof.  

       I am at a loss.  He is the love of my life, and a wonderful person when in a good mood, but I worry all of the time, especially about our son and how this is affecting him.