Yes, I think its because when we have a bond with someone, their good qualities stay in our mind. Then we look for those qualities in other people and naturally seek them out.

Just my opinion.

I used to think my husband and my dad were just alike. Then my husband turned into a jerk, and I saw all these "qualities" that I was blind to before. They really aren't anything alike.

That's what I'm afraid of too, being blind-sided by my own glossy thinking, overlooking the new person's "true" nature...

Paul McCartney made that classic mistake with his new Linda lookalike soon-to-be-ex-wife-from hell.

Thanks for the insight, sunny.

Oh boy.. do want to know about the bond.. Its been years since I stopped talking to a certain person, cause of my ego and self respect but now that I look back at it.. He was more then a brother to me then any of my family ever was.. we could finish each others sentences.. we thought the same way.... we thought about making money the same way.. but the thing that scared me was I got sober and grew more integrity and discipline were he began to make choices of people that would bring him down... not people that would lift him up.. I can never or I should say I will never look at him in a negative way... I forget the bad... and look only at the diamond that he will always be in my mind.. under the coal is a beatiful never ending beatiful diamond. I miss the crazy phone calls and the silly messages... he gave me such strength and taught me uncondaitional love but somehow it got twisted.. somehow the evil began to divide our friendship... or I should say other people... I think that when that bond is so strong no one can damage it ever.. and I also think that of all the people on the whole planet I miss him his mom and his brother at Xmas time more then anyone... His brother was a great kisser and always told me how it was and was more of a father to my son than my skank exhusand ever was... and his mom God Bless her she taught me how to be a mom and she does not even know it.. But people change and others are more important... Again I will miss them the most...

Anytime, Koolman...

I knew that witch McCartney married would show her true colors soon enough. Ugh... was against it from the start. Poor Paul.

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Some people just are themselves, BUT from time to time I see distinct traits in them that my Sister had (She too passed away due to Cancer) and it is uncanny !

I truly believe that the loved ones who leave do not 'leave' entirely !

They like to "show up" at peculiar times and places, so they never get too far to the back of one's mind.

As for physical similarities, that is weird !!!

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donamarie: Thanks! Boy, you nailed my brother's situation to a tee. He had this blinding white light about him, like he was meant to soar with the angels, and, sadly, he surrounded himself with some real skanky women. Perhaps it's lonely at the top and it's easier to sink to the standards of loathsome others at the bottom, because there's a lot of good company there...? His job was beneath his intelligence; he was a truck-driver who delivered wine for a local distributor. He was brilliant in math and science in high school, but chose to drop out and get his GED because he hated being stuck in class and wanted to hang with his dead-beat friends riding BMX bikes. Of course, our mom told him "if you want to drop out of high school, that's fine, but you're gonna get a full-time job", so he did, and thus began the downward spiral of depression and neediness that he tried to fill with women, one of whom was sweet but needy (whom he conceived his now-16-year-old-daughter with), the others who were fiercely independent and bitchy. I'm trying so hard not to fall into this same trap; I'm independent in every way except emotionally. I'm a very warm-hearted person in need of someone to love, and, hopefully, who will love and compliment me. It's so difficult to go through the struggle of life alone, and we need a "help-mate", as Genesis says in the Bible. Sadly, so many of us choose people that tear us down or just use us for their own selfish needs rather than work with us so that we can both mutually build each other up...

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#7

Very true.

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#6...so true, Ronin. Our loved ones will always be in our hearts. Something will bring them to mind and we smile, and sometimes we cry, too. Whether they're family or friends...we love and miss them.