Healthy Relationships Support Group
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I am 45 years old and sometimes I think I am not any wiser than when I was a kid. When I was a kid and someone treated me bad I would not play with them anymore. That doesn't seem to work as an adult.
My husband can be the most selfish person sometimes. If you asked him, I would be selfish. Who is right?? Maybe we both are.
I just do not appreciate being rudely waken up during the night. I do not do that to him and expect the same. I realize that intimacy is important but jeez there are better ways to initiate it!
We need to get back to that healthy place in our relationship but not sure how to get there....
My husband can be the most selfish person sometimes. If you asked him, I would be selfish. Who is right?? Maybe we both are.
I just do not appreciate being rudely waken up during the night. I do not do that to him and expect the same. I realize that intimacy is important but jeez there are better ways to initiate it!
We need to get back to that healthy place in our relationship but not sure how to get there....
So...I guess he's "rudely awakening" you for sex?
How to get there: I guess be more appreciative of his advances and he should be more appreciative of the fact that you're trying to sleep.
Anyway I think maybe a weekend away from everything may help!
Thanks for the advice...
Are there other times during the day when the two of you make time for physical intimacy? Is late at night the only time when you are both alone and not doing anything else? Making time for physical intimacy in a marriage is important. Finding a time that you are both happy about is the key to making that time beneficial for BOTH of you.
You are 100% right...physical intimacy is important and I have tried initiating it at different times and it seems like it is always on his schedule anymore and it is making me resentful.
I probably wouldn't mind if I was woke up nicely...not with a "Hey you awake??"
You sound very considerate!!
Thanks again...
Eventually my husband and I had a serious talk about the issue and we were able to solve the problem.
If it's middle of the night, I have been sleeping for several hours and I have to work next morning....he won't bother me but
if I am off from work on the next day, he can wake me up at any time.
This works perfectly for both of us since both our needs are met.
To be honest, I like when he wakes me up out of nowhere. ..he has a special way of turning me on :)
Have you ever taken the time to gently tell your husband that you do appreciate his advances, and that you would enjoy them even more during the night if he (insert action words here). Examples of action words....woke you up with soft kisses up and down your neck or back, lightly rubbed your back or your inner thigh area or any other area on your body that is erotic to you? Guys are pretty simple....they are not mind readers though. Tell a guy what you like to make you happy, and a caring and loving husband will most likely start doing it for you. The key for you then, is after they do what you have requested and it felt good to you and pleases you, give them praise and actually tell them that their actions made you so happy and made you felt loved even more by them. Men love praise and compliments just as much as women do!
Here's wishing you the BEST for many more sexually satisfying nights and total enjoyment for you both!!
Kiss me, run your fingers down my hip, tell me that i am the hottest woman on earth and play with me."