Healthy Relationships Support Group
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I received a text from my ex a couple of weeks ago and I replied by saying that I think we should continue to pretend like the other doesn't exist. She said OK.
Well today I was with a good friend and we were talking about her because I had a dream about her the night before. 1 where we fought and yelled at each other. See the thing is she cheated on me and never owned up to it. She constantly lied to me about it but the guy she cheated on me with is living with her. They've been together sense before we broke up. My friend told me that I should contact her and see if she'd at least finally after 5 months of not talking with her if she'd just own up to her cheating on me. I was hesitant at first but all I really want is for her to just admit that she had cheated on me. Well that didn't happen. She told me that she never cheated on me and has been single ever sense. Well the thing is we have mutual friends and the guy she was fucking while I was with her is still living with her.
I really don't understand why someone has to hold on to a lie after there is no reason to lie anymore. I just wanted her to own up to replacing me with someone else but she wold not do it.
So now I regret talking to her. She called me an ass and said thanks again for accusing me, it really feels good.
So messaging her wasn't the best idea and now I just opened up some old wounds I had.
She made me feel worthless and I loved her so much. It stings every time she lies to me so I told her that I know what happened. I told her I didn't need her to tell me anything. I just thought you might tell ne the truth after all this time has passed. I also told her that I really loved her and her daughters and she ripped my heart out when she started fucking that other guy.
All this time and my heart weeps, my self confidence shattered.
This whole time passes and she still holds on to a lie.
Well today I was with a good friend and we were talking about her because I had a dream about her the night before. 1 where we fought and yelled at each other. See the thing is she cheated on me and never owned up to it. She constantly lied to me about it but the guy she cheated on me with is living with her. They've been together sense before we broke up. My friend told me that I should contact her and see if she'd at least finally after 5 months of not talking with her if she'd just own up to her cheating on me. I was hesitant at first but all I really want is for her to just admit that she had cheated on me. Well that didn't happen. She told me that she never cheated on me and has been single ever sense. Well the thing is we have mutual friends and the guy she was fucking while I was with her is still living with her.
I really don't understand why someone has to hold on to a lie after there is no reason to lie anymore. I just wanted her to own up to replacing me with someone else but she wold not do it.
So now I regret talking to her. She called me an ass and said thanks again for accusing me, it really feels good.
So messaging her wasn't the best idea and now I just opened up some old wounds I had.
She made me feel worthless and I loved her so much. It stings every time she lies to me so I told her that I know what happened. I told her I didn't need her to tell me anything. I just thought you might tell ne the truth after all this time has passed. I also told her that I really loved her and her daughters and she ripped my heart out when she started fucking that other guy.
All this time and my heart weeps, my self confidence shattered.
This whole time passes and she still holds on to a lie.
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Hey All...I hope that you have a lovely, peaceful beginning of your weekI have a bunch of chores that need doing but may put them off til tomorrow and just hang out with my landlord/roomie todayWhat about you?...Anything special going on?Have a great day and take good care of you!!..Xo
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Once again I've had a fever today. I'm not going to the hospital because that's a huge waste of time but I did schedule a dr appointment for Wednesday afternoon.
I am sorry you are hurting.
Try to keep yourself occupied and focus on the positive and don't listen to that friend's advise in regard to her again.
I'm sorry you' re in so much pain. Sometimes the people who hurt us, whether past loves, friends, family, have their own version of reality and the truth, and there is not enough begging or pleading or explaining that we can do that makes them see their wrongs or admit things. So it has to be enough to just know your own truth and accept they never will. Otherwise, you can never really move forward and you just end up torturing yourself over and over again. So truly, accept she is never going to admit it. You have to find a way to make peace with that. That doesn't give her a pass or make what she did ok. It will just help you get out from under this hold it has on you.
I agree with Aronia to try to keep yourself occupied and focus on good and positive things. Control what is within your control.
That was the wrong advice.
When someone is a liar they will lie till the end, trust me.
She is never going to admit it.
Move on and go kick your friend.
We tried to have a relationship together but I feel nothing for her. I think that she thinks that I'm just hung up on my ex.
I started dating a couple of months after me and my ex to prove to myself that I was ready to date. I basically had a be a whore moment that caused me nothing but greif.
My friend was there for me threw out the rough patches.
I guess she was tired of hearing me complain about her she told me to talk to her. She said I was harboring old wounds that needed to be addressed. I knew better but messaged her anyways.
I sent my ex 1 last message. I don't know what part of me thought it was a good idea to bring up this shit again or to even contact you.
My heart aches for my ex and I don't understand why I can't just let it all go.
My advice is to talk to dudes :-)
SunCloud yes it is completely over. I just wanted an ounce of decency from my ex. I knew better though.
Aronia I am kind of violent towards other men. The whole male ego thing kinda irritates me to no end. I don't know if it's me or them but I don't get along with that many guys. I only have 1 guy friend I hang out with regularly and even that friendship can be weird for me at times.
I've kinda have a hatred for men in general. I think it has a lot to do with a stepfather and other bad experiences I had.
"Your Peace is more important than driving yourself crazy trying to understand why something happened the way it did. Let it go."
OTM
I think sometimes there's this myth about closure, that closure must come from the offender. But really, to me, closure is something you do, for yourself. You decide here and now, no contact, no letting your friends get in your head about her, no more lamenting what she will never do. Just shut it down. That's closure.
It's just hard at times to forgive someone you have loved.
I can do it and often feel like I have bit then this horrible sadness comes back and it feels like it had just happened. It's something to say you forgive someone and to actually forgive someone. I'm afraid to even utter the word forgive because those memories might come back and haunt me.