Ok well I'm new to this group. So hi first of all. I need to vent however get some advice too. Ok a bit of back story I guess I have been with my husband for almost 4 years together 3 actually married. We were really happy and doing good until a little over a year ago. He asked if his brother could come and live with us. It's his older brother who is a disabled vet, and I agreed. It's been hell since then but that's not the main problem. Anyways my husband and I started to get into some really bad fights and between us both losing our jobs and then getting new ones and then stress of his brother living with us and then my dad got really sick things in our marriage fell apart quickly and he pulled away and end up telling me that if I had a place to go he would tell me to leave because we had grown apart and he was sick of trying to save our marriage because it kept coming back to us being unhappy.
Well the very beginning to July I told him that he had to choices and it was either we work on fixing our marriage or I leave and I gave him a few hours to think and he said that maybe some time apart would do us some good. So I came home and packed up some stuff and my dog and cats and my son and we left. It was the day before the Fourth of July. He didn't talk to me for two days and I text him to find out what was going on and he said he wanted out of our marriage and to come by to talk about why. So I did and I left heart broken and confused. I stayed at my parents house for a week then found my own place because I couldn't stay with my parents in a two bedroom house to cramped and I felt unwelcome anyway.
So I have been on my own for over a month and a half. And I'm ok and because my husband bonded with my son who is 13 he wanted to spend time with him which I allowed because it's the only dad he has know but anyways a few weeks ago my husband told me maybe we could work things out and get back together, while I was super excited I held back my hope cause it wasn't an absolute and that was the end to that conversation. Now in almost four years up until our separation there wasn't a day that went by that we didn't at least talk to each other. Well my car broke down a week ago and the only person I knew who could help me was my husband so I texted him for his help and he came over to my house. He stayed for a while so he could see my son once he got home from school and he told me he missed me, and he gave me a hug. A few nights later he said he wanted to do marriage counseling and I said ok. We are back to talking everyday like we were and it feels a little weird. Today in front of me he ripped up the divorce papers that he signed right after I left.
Ok here's where I need the advice, right after I left he contacted his ex girlfriend she lives on the other side of the us but he pretty much had a emotional relationship with her while we were apart and he told her that he loved her and I found out while we were separated about all of this. But I still am in love with my husband and he tells me that he doesn't love her he just reached out for something when I left and that he realizes he was an ahole for all the hell he put me through and doesn't want his ex he wants me. And that he is very sorry and will never talk to her again. Now I can't talk to any of my family about this cause they don't like my husband after everything I have gone through and I don't blame them but I don't know what to do. I wanted him to choose me and he finally is but he told her he loved her after we split. Is there any hope. I hope the counselor will help with these question to but I'm just afraid to give him my heart again and have it broken again especially since it's only taped up from the last time. Sorry this is so long just hoping maybe someone has been here to give me some insight.