Not all men are the same just as not all women are the same, I would work on your self and then when you are ready to meet somebody you will don't rush into anything just meet new freinds have fun and take it from there.

Hey voiceit, It's totally fine to ease yourself back into the dating pool. I'm sort of in the same position. My last relationship wasn't the greatest and I'm a little gun shy.

You definitely have some options open to you. You could take a break from the dating and turn to other relationships. True, you won't get the flirting and physical affection from others but you can get the emotional support, which it sounds like you need right now. Spend more time with friends and family, join organized activities where you can meet new people in a fun, safe way and build up your social network.

If/when you do date, talk to the guy. When you get to the third date have a little talk and explain where you're at. Try not to get negative and DON'T start going on about the ex or court business. Just explain you want to go slow and give him a general idea why.

Good luck! :-)

Aww...we're not all bad. Just be aware of those "dark forces" when you see them surface in him (propensity for anger or lying) and be prepared to bail if something is outside your comfort zone.

Always meet a first-time date in public. Don't invite him to your home until you feel comfortable with him. Make damn sure he has condoms on hand for sex, and you carry some on you yourself just in case the idiot doesn't and you're still attracted to him.

I am going through a similar situation. I had a very bad relationship last go around, and I want to date again and have tried a little bit but feel so burnt from the last one I don't think it's really fair to myself or anyone else until I am fully over what happened, and the anger i have toward that one person. It is hard to not let the judgement of one filter over to others, when you were burned so badly. I understand how you feel. I would say take time for yourself and find out what you want, and not settle for anything less than that. Good luck to you!!!

My marriage of 14 years with an abusive addict is ending. He is leaving me because he says I don't know how to be a woman and he can't stand me.
Really it's that I will no longer enable him. I think I will not ever date again. I feel too used up. Too drained, too undesireable. That is most likely the pain of the now talking but I think you have to be careful because it's you and I who may be "choosing" this type of man. (not on purpose though)
Get right in your own head so you don't attract his type again. This is coming to you straight from a bum magnet!
I am a rescuer by nature.. find me the broken and unstable and I will take them home... I am going to limit this to animals now. lol
Animals when helped are greatful and "want" to move on. People hold on to crap and use it against you and want to hurt you. I was not able to see this and recognize it for that it was until it was too late. I have been married 2x and both men the same. broken and unstable with serious "mother" issues which caused them to hate and or disrespect women. You will not see this when you first meet them. They lie and act "normal" to get you and then the abuse sets in once you are committed with kids, marriage or financially committed. I think I will stick with my dogs from now on.... much safer