Healthy Relationships Support Group
No relationship is perfect. A long-term relationship requires constant effort to understand each other, fix misunderstandings, solve problems and continue to grow as both individuals change and evolve. How we deal with our misunderstandings is the focus of this community. Join us to find support, get advice, and share your experience with your relationship.
Hi everyone,
I had posted about a month ago, about being uncomfortable with the speed of my relationship. My girlfriend was giving me an ultimatum about her and her kids moving in with me. We had broken up since, and although it was a clean breakup at first, she initiated conversation, and tried to get away from the ultimatum part. But I decided that we should still part ways..
One month later, and I think I made the right call. I wasn't feeling the future of our relationship then, and I wasn't comfortable, I realized, with the time I was taking away from my girls to be with her and her kids. They're only young once....Not that I want my girls to stop me from being in a relationship - , butI also just wasn't happy with what it would mean being in a blended family, and the idea of seeing her kids more than I saw mine..Just not ready for that big of a change. And selfishly, I'm enjoying my free time when I don't have my girls - ( I have them 50% of the time). I'm not ready to give that up...
Despite that, it still hurts. I realize now how much she loved me...There were good things about the relationship - the kids all getting along, her always being there for me, the way our personalities complemented each other. I wonder if anyone else will love me the way she did. Unfortunately I wasn't in a place to return it, and I wasn't going to continue the relationship if I wasn't sure of our future, or with the speed the relationship was progressing... And it wouldn't be fair to her for me to stay partially in.
I suppose it's normal to wonder? Anyways, thanks for letting me ramble.
I had posted about a month ago, about being uncomfortable with the speed of my relationship. My girlfriend was giving me an ultimatum about her and her kids moving in with me. We had broken up since, and although it was a clean breakup at first, she initiated conversation, and tried to get away from the ultimatum part. But I decided that we should still part ways..
One month later, and I think I made the right call. I wasn't feeling the future of our relationship then, and I wasn't comfortable, I realized, with the time I was taking away from my girls to be with her and her kids. They're only young once....Not that I want my girls to stop me from being in a relationship - , butI also just wasn't happy with what it would mean being in a blended family, and the idea of seeing her kids more than I saw mine..Just not ready for that big of a change. And selfishly, I'm enjoying my free time when I don't have my girls - ( I have them 50% of the time). I'm not ready to give that up...
Despite that, it still hurts. I realize now how much she loved me...There were good things about the relationship - the kids all getting along, her always being there for me, the way our personalities complemented each other. I wonder if anyone else will love me the way she did. Unfortunately I wasn't in a place to return it, and I wasn't going to continue the relationship if I wasn't sure of our future, or with the speed the relationship was progressing... And it wouldn't be fair to her for me to stay partially in.
I suppose it's normal to wonder? Anyways, thanks for letting me ramble.
Re-read your previous posts from before... This is not the way you felt back then and the fact that she gave up on you so quickly because you did not deliver everything she demanded kinda worries me about where you would be in this relationship in 5 years.
had she messaged you or anything since you broke up?
Usually when people are in love a month of time is like torture and they will start messaging again.
Yeah that's not cool!