Relationships have taken a toll on me. First, I was married to someone who wound up cheating on me. It hurt like hell. My heart was ripped from my chest and I never thought that I would breathe again. He was so hateful and nasty when he did it,there was never any remorse and when it became evident that he was going to continue with his behavior, I threw in the towel. I was 43 years old with three kids and terrified about the prospect of dating.Fearful that I would never find anyone who would love me. After that I dated a guy for two years,I really liked him but he wound up getting married on me. Fast forward to now, I had been dating a guy for three years,I thought that everything was going ok. He loved my kids,they loved him. I let my walls down with him unlike any man that had been previously in my life. The lovemaking was awesome,it was quite honestly the first time a man had made love to me(or at least so I thought). He would have problems achieving an erection but we always managed to make it work. I never said anything about the issue because I was being sensitive and didn't want to hurt his self esteem. All of a sudden, sex became more and more infrequent. And finally after all this time, I broached the subject with him just to have him be so very mean and hurtful towards me-he told me that he wanted to see other women, that he is attracted to other women and that thy are attracted to him and that he no longer wants a relationship with me. I think what hurts so much is that he knew that I had been hurt by men leaving me for other women and yet he still went there.I trusted him with the deepest part of myself, and in the end he used that very thing to hurt me. Finally, he told me that he has issues with ED and that he always has,that he doesn't really have a sex drive. I had noticed certain things but once again I loved him so much, that I did not make a big deal about it. I wanted to talk to him but he would never open up about sex at all. I never tore him down or made him feel like less than a man, but yet here I am holding my broken heart in my hand. I still love him and would love to have a relationship with him.I would have been willing to hold his hand thru all of this and perhaps see a dr with him but he took that choice out of my hands. I am hurting so badly.Someone said to me that he did not mean the evil things that he said that he was trying to push me away.I don't know if I can pick up the pieces of my broken heart this time around. Maybe if is broken,it needs to stay that way.