So, I caught my husband in an affair a couple years back. He confessed to everything AFTER I figured it out for myself. I had to drag information out of him and he never volunteered any information on his own. We went for counciling and things got better. I put my everything into saving this marriage after I wanted to leave a couple times. My situation made it impossible to leave since we are in the process of immigrating to the states and I am dependant on him for our greencards. So I stayed and since I had no other choice felt like I did love him enough and he really didn't want to lose me, so I assume he feels the same. However, every time I open myself up to him he keeps on hurting me over and over again. He has a foot fetish, and a major hurt came from that. He always adored my feet and I didn't know foot fetishes existed, so I had this idea that it was the most special thing on earth that my husband even loved my FEET amongst all my other bodyparts. Just before the affair I found out he was ogling every women's feet that has feet, and even flirted with a woman that worked in the same building as him during smoke breaks, always talking about her shoes etc. THAT in itself felt like an affair. Here I was under the impression he just loved so much of me that it went as far as loving MY feet (which is the most humbling thing as in the Bible the lady washed Jesus's feet). Now, after the affair, when we are supposed to be working towards building a new life and relationship, he still goes around ogling other women's feet! Every single time he does that, it feels like he is cheating on me all over again. This might sound weird, but wouldn't you think if he wants me bad enough, he could enjoy MY feet and that will be enough for him? I bloody bend myself backwards working to fit around his fetish and understand it and get over my hurts and he just gets the joys of it all. I won't do that anymore. I guess if he can't get over other women's feet and mine isn't enough, then this feet issue is going to ultimately take our marriage into divorce.
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