Graves' Disease Support Group
Graves-Basedow disease is a medical disorder that may manifest several different conditions including hyperthyroidism (over activity of thyroid hormone production), infiltrative exophthalmos (protruberance of one or both eyes and associated problems) and infiltrative dermopathy (a skin condition usually of the lower extremities). This disorder is the most common cause of...
hi I been married only 2 years, and recently my husband found out he has Graves’ disease and that he had it for a while and we just didn’t know, we are now treating it with meds. His thyroid was 3.9 now it is a 2.9
i don’t know how this support group really works but my husband has been so mean to me, he really don’t talk to me at all, sex is maybe once a month, I try my best to be supportive to try to make him laugh, I try to make conversation and there’s even times where he walks away from me as I’m talking without a word.. I just wanna know is this normal for someone with G.D ? I really need some kinda answers I have really been thinking about a divorce
Your husband was just given news that will change his whole life and yours, as well. It would be best for him to do a lot of research about this auto-immune disease so he can come out on the other end....even better than before. Unfortunately Graves Disease affects the emotions because of all the things going on with him. GD affects body temperature, skin, bones, emotions (Graves Rage) metabolism, etc. EVERYONE is individual with their symptoms and side effects and triggers.
I understand that this will be a trying time for you (and especially, for him) but hang in there.
Is your husband seeing an Endocrinologist?
What did the doctor say to do?
What tests did the doctor give your husband?
Was his T.S.H., Free T3 and Free T4 numbers and ranges?
If your husband is on Methimazole (anti-thyroid drug - ATD) there MIGHT be some side effects?
It takes 4-6 weeks for the medication to start calming the thyroid (and him) down.
If you or him have any questions, PLEASE feel free to ask. There are no stupid questions. We are all in this together to help and share. Take Care.
He’s been on Methimazole since a few months now, he was taking 5 pills of 5mg a day now he’s doctor told him to take 4 1/2 a day.. and the doctor recommended the surgery to cut out his thyroid or radiation pills, but now my husbands parents are wondering if that’s what’s best? I honestly just want my husband back..
I suggest you have your husband come to the forum so we can have a clear conversation of what has been done and what can be done to make his life better. If it were me - don’t let him do it. I had been on the meds for a year and now I don’t have to take them. (For now)
But I needed to change what I ate, what I use for personal products and what I clean with. They ALL have to do with dealing with Graves Disease..
Hang in there!
It sounds like from the symptoms described that your husband's Free T3 and Free T4 levels may not be in the 'right' places to feel best there at. Those of us with GD issues feel our best to avoid many symptoms by having our FT3 at the mid range of the normal lab reference ranges and our FT4 at the upper third range.
Since GD is an autoimmune disorder, by making the changes to our diet, going for more friendlier 'green' household and personal products, our bodies will feel less revved up. To do this would be using organic, non-GMO, less chemicals, toxins, and preservatives. Read the ingredients and labels.
{{{hugs}}}
I feel like none of his complaints warrant a divorce, which he is now asking for. There is no infidelity, no addiction, no drugs, no abuse. Yes we've grown apart but it's nothing that can't be fixed without some small changes...changes I've been making since he told me he didn't love me anymore in November. I've taken on more around the house, trying my best to make his life as easy as possible. He claims he is not attracted to me anymore: not physically, emotionally or spiritually. It is so incredibly hurtful. Yet I'm hanging on because I know the man I married is still in there. Our girls deserve a mom and dad who gave their marriage a fighting chance, who didn't give up easily.
He says that now that his levels are where they should be, it's not the Graves anymore. But my research shows otherwise. It could take months for his brain to catch up. I'm willing to wait it out because I love him deeply and I want to save our family.
I wish I had some advice. Just know you are not alone.
I am sorry there are issues. Unfortunately Graves' Disease is an autoimmune disorder which means it will be with those of us til we die. We can go into periodic remissions, but the disease is still there lurking.
I would bet that your husband's thyroid levels of the Free T3 and the Free T4 are not where these should be even though your husband says it is.
Read what I typed in the above last post of mine.
Your husband needs to figure what in his diet, in the household and personal products used that is setting off his GD. If there are any other autoimmune disorders (as it is with me) steps are needed to be taken to keep as balanced as possible.
If your husband works, he may also be triggering with GD symptoms from being around people who put chemicals on their bodies as well as buildings which can off gas chemicals and toxins from products used to build those buildings in the first place, etc.
Stress can be a factor so can being exposed to smoking (vaping too) which the products used to make these smoking things to be full of GMO, MSG, toxins, and chemicals.
Given all these possibilities and more that triggers autoimmune disorders, steps can be taken to reduce and avoid triggers. Then the body begins its healing including brain health.
{{{hugs}}}
I would like to make an observation and also share something.
I have been here for a year and I have have not seen too many men communicate on this forum. I hear a lot of women sharing their feelings but not men.
My father (88 years old) was confirmed with Graves Disease 30 years ago. The same age I was confirmed (last year). Only after experiencing my own GD symptoms, I was able to understand what my father went through so many years ago. I remember all the yelling in the house. My father’s sensitive nature - if I looked at him the wrong way or breathed, it would set him off. Now, I could understand how he felt. What his body and mind were doing to him. It did not help that I was a very sensitive child and took it all personally. I can look back and see it wasn’t me. It was him.
I wonder if men experience GD differently than women. Where anger is more prevalent vs. anxiety on a woman’s part. We are all human but we do have a different hormonal make-up.
BritLin,
I am sorry that your husband is still experiencing some of the GD rage/anger. You say he has had GD since last fall - it hasn’t been a year, yet. Is he still on meds?
Having GD is a true balancing act. Even when the numbers are in normal range - our free T3 & Free T4 need to be higher for us to feel better.
GD definitely can put a strain on the marriage. Like MM said, eat the right foods and use the non-toxic personal and cleaning products. When you have a stressful day, go take a lavendar epson salt bath, that will calm your whole body. Not sure if your husband would do that - (I do) - and I feel so much better/calmer.
For me, having GD has given me a reason to be the most direct with my husband. When I am not feeling well, I let him know and when I need space, I let him know. When I need him - I let him know. This is no perfect marriage BUT it has gotten much better since I let him know what is on my mind and what I need. (Then I can yell at him if he is not listening :-)
Much Love to you all.