Are the children eligible for Medical Assistance in your state? In Wisconsin, the grandparent's income is not counted for MA so grandchildren do qualify. However, here, the nearest dentist who will accept MA is at the teaching facility of a university in another town about 25 miles away. No dentist in our city accepts MA, even for children.

Kat, we earn too much for anything but SCHIP. And NJ is so broke they've already cut some benefits.

I would rather not take benefits unless my back was against the wall, anyway. It's the principle that I dislike. Helping the poor is a wonderful thing, and a duty for all of us. But somehow that has gotten skewed to the point where Pinky can have her teeth whitened at no expense!!!

Our private dental insurance pays for root canal -- but not the replacement crown (about $1000). Pinky gets the whole shooting match for free. And then she goes out and does drugs, while we go out and work.

To me there's no sense in that at all. None.

Where does that make sense?

In my state, De, children are the only ones covered by the dental insurance under Medical Assistance. If you are an adult they don't cover dental or eye's. Just your Dr. appointments and medicine.

I hear you, Sara. Read this on a Facebook page: "I have to pass a drug test to keep my job. Why shouldn't you have to pass a drug test to get your welfare check?" It's so true!

Kat, I've been thinking they should drug-test welfare recipients for a long time.

Of course not all welfare moms are druggies. But there just seem to be so many! And what's so unfair is that while others are slaving away to raise and financially support the children (of those who abandon them), these "moms" are getting free food, housing, cars and insurance (in some cases), cadillac healthcare, and more.

There's something fundamentally wrong about that.

I know what you mean. My neice is adicted to prescription drugs. My brother has Huntington's Disease and is disabled. His judgement and ability to think and reason is impaired, but he is not yet legally incompetent. He would do well in assisted living. However, his daughter, the druggie, is not willing to work and just wants to keep taking the drugs. So, she convinced him to live with her so she can live off his disability check. She does nothing to take care of him, sleeps for days when she runs out of pills (which is why she won't work), but he won't leave her to go to assisted living because she would be living in the streets without his check. She has a million excuses why she can't work - she has fibromyalgia, disc problems, joint problems, mono, etc, etc. - she's only 33 years old! She doesn't pay her bills - had her electricity turned off. Now she put the bill in my brother's name! I'm sure she won't pay that either. She lost her driver's license and just got arrested for driving without a license - 7th offense!

I wish her ex-husband (he's a good guy, remarried, stable home) would file for full custody of their 7-year-old. I think he believes he doesn't have enough proof she's unfit. He did report her to DSF when the electricity was turned off. My brother's ex-wife is disgusted with their daughter and even said she doesn't blame her ex-son-in-law for reporting that his son was living in a house with no electricity. She tried intervention for her daughter but it did not work and she's at a loss as to what to do.

Kat, disability is the other issue.

A neighbor's husband has something called ankylosing spondylitis, leaving him virtually unable to turn, lie down without pain, move, lift, walk, you name it. All that's left for him is pain management. he can't get disability.

Yet Pinky, as a prescription drug addict, is one step away from qualifying for about $800/month for life, PLUS about $7,000 in retroactive payments.

There is something so fundamentally wrong about this I don't even know where to begin.

I am going to assume that is SSI---what is wrong with her that she would qualify for SSI.

When my kids were very young and I left my first husband we lived in subsidized housing. The girl that lived down the street from me received a welfare check and then found out b/c her boys were ADD/ADHD they were considered disabled. She was then able to collect 3 SSI check for 800.00 a piece for them and a welfare check for her and her 2 daughters. She made more a month than I do now. Plus food stamps/reduced rent/ and free medical.

Living there I saw alot of people abuse the system. Selling their stamps for .50 cent on the dollar. Then their kids looked like the were homeless and they never had enough to eat. These are the type of people that make me sick. They are the reason a lot of people look down on people receiving benefits from the state.

I also think it is all screwed up...when we were landlords for a house we owned years ago we had a mother with 3 children and occasional boyfriend rent from us.

She had all these benefits and my husband and I were working our butts off only charging the mortgage payment to this mom. Her kids and her had better clothes and electronics then us and my husband and I worked but we paid our bills first!! She would have a yard sale and I would go to buy her kids used clothes...she had a cell phone back then my husband and I thought it was a waste to have one back then because we both worked close to home.

We ended up evicting her for non-payment and trashing our house and not paying for damage. They were able to live there free for almost 3 months until the sheriff day came to move her out. they moved out the night before sheriff and made sure that they trashed as much as they could to hurt us. The second month they lived there free they made sure they drove past our house with a New (used) truck that they bought with our money that they owed us!!! What she didn't realize was that being evicted was like bankruptcy and is on your record for 10 yrs...She just loved rubbing in our face that we couldn't just take our house back and in the morning my husband would drive past the rental and see that they were destroying the hand made Victorian fence that we built. I called the police and they said it is a landlord tenant issue and they couldn't do anything about it!! They stood on the porch and just laughed at us when the police told us that!!! But it is just like you stated it is backwards...they got a free ride and we had to do everything by the book or we would have to pay her. Luckily I had a good lease (not that they followed it) and judges look at that. We also had good pictures of the damage...she was so evil that she closed all the vents in bathroom to create mold and was intending to sue us!!!

Some of these type of folks know how to make the system work for them...that experience really set me back in my thoughts of mankind that someone would try to take away my house that my husband and I worked hard for and plus sue any money we had saved for our family....

Judi

The nearest dentist to me who accepts the state program is over 70 miles away. :P

The state doesn't pay the dentist's enough for them to accept the state insurance. So I will have to pay cash or travel 70 miles every time he has a cavity.... :P

And I haven't had health insurance for 2 years, but most of the people I work with are on our state plan. I am a single grandparent raising a child...... most of them have live-ins. (not married, cuz then they couldn't get the insurance). It DEFINITELY IS SCREWED UP, as I think I've said a few times before.... :P

It is SSI, Jeannie -- and addiction now qualifies as a disability. I just think about it and get sick.

Don't pay your mortgage and the government will bail you out. Work your butt off to pay your mortgage and you get nothing but more work.

The whole system is upside down IMHO. The bios get free legal help to keep babies they didn't want in the first place. We grans have to pay our own lawyers to give the kids a safe, clean, loving place to live. And we'd rather not have to do it in the first place!!!!

Nothing is right anymore, and I have no idea how it can get back to "normal" again.

Really??? Then I should qualify as "disabled" also and few other of us on here should also. I am suffering from PTKD( Post Traumatic Kid Disorder) caused by the daughter who child I have. Between her drug addiction and her bi polar she has mad me crazy. I am on meds for high blood pressure, anxiety, and an anti depressant. SO CAN I PLEASE GET EVERYTHING FOR FREE TOO????

Your right it's not fair and the system is broken! Just because they need braces, doesn't mean you can afford to give them braces. I needed braces as a kid, my mom and dad couldn't afford them. When I was 25 I was able to afford them for me! Sure I didn't smile as much as I should have growing up and did it scare me for life...NO! My 31 year old neice just got her braces on. My father-in-law when he was in his forties got braces. If the children can chew and no other medical problems due to their teeth, then let it go! all we can do is know when we lay our heads down at night we can say job well done, lets get ready for tomorrow. Our GC need our Love, Support, Food, Shelter and our Wisdom. We can't fix the system, but we can teach these kids that life isn't fair show them how to make lemon aide when were dealt with a bunch of lemons.

I'm with you, Jeanie! Post Traumatic Kid Disorder needs to be put in the texbooks, for sure! LOL

And NutsandBolts, your advice is good. Our two eldest suck their thumbs, anyway, and I've told them no braces until they stop. Maybe I'll win the Lottery....HAHAHAHA!