Grandparents Raising Children Support Group
This community is dedicated to grandparents who are the primary caregivers of their grandchildren. In cases where the parents are not willing or able to provide adequate care for their children, grandparents may take on the role of primary caregivers. Join the support group to find support, share your experience, and get advice from other members.
My GD was referred to several psychologists after her assessment by Neuro Psychologist. They either did not have openings for months or didn't take her insurance.
I found a MFTMA (Marriage and Family Therapist with her masters) that treated only teen girls and women and specializes in domestic abuse and could see GD right away. We have been going every week since December. I was included in the beginning but now I only go in occassionally.
We told her GD needed help to process abuse, her recent move to our house, attachment issues, her severe anxiety problems, self esteem and needed exercises to help her memory.
So far, all the therapist has addressed is GD's relationship with me. And when I came in last week, therapist referred to me as "Mom" several times. I feel she just doesn't get it.
I want to find a Psychologist for GD who can address her issues and help her. Not this therapist who acts like we are in family counseling. But GD really likes her so I'm worried about disrupting her by starting with somebody new. It took me forever to convince her to give this a try!
After therapy yesterday I talked to GD about my thoughts and asked her to think about it and let me know in a few days. Any thoughts on this?
I found a MFTMA (Marriage and Family Therapist with her masters) that treated only teen girls and women and specializes in domestic abuse and could see GD right away. We have been going every week since December. I was included in the beginning but now I only go in occassionally.
We told her GD needed help to process abuse, her recent move to our house, attachment issues, her severe anxiety problems, self esteem and needed exercises to help her memory.
So far, all the therapist has addressed is GD's relationship with me. And when I came in last week, therapist referred to me as "Mom" several times. I feel she just doesn't get it.
I want to find a Psychologist for GD who can address her issues and help her. Not this therapist who acts like we are in family counseling. But GD really likes her so I'm worried about disrupting her by starting with somebody new. It took me forever to convince her to give this a try!
After therapy yesterday I talked to GD about my thoughts and asked her to think about it and let me know in a few days. Any thoughts on this?
Then again listening to your guts is important. Do not be afraid to ask the counselor why she is covering the relationships the way she is..
That said, the kids' connection to the therapist is everything. Our eldest totally identified with her counselor (transference) within a few sessions and is a completely different girl a year later. No more cutting, confident, honor roll - she's a pleasure to live with.
The middle girl, not so much. Her counselor is more into the behavior training mode rather than talk therapy. So far our granddaughter's grades are coming up, she keeps her room cleaner and is behaving better. But I sense that she still has unexpressed issues. But if she won't talk to her counselor there's little we can do except to continue to build trust with her. I'll take any improvement!
The bottom line is that if your granddaughter is relating to her therapist, that's a good thing. And don't worry that you're involved - you should be, since it's a family affair. I learned some things that I need to do or stop doing, and it has made a major difference. :-)
But GD is relating to her and feels comfortable with her and that is SO important. I did tell the therapist that I hoped she would help GD with her anxiety last week, so we'll see.
But the point is that she knew all about separation anxiety and other issues that come up when kids are being raised by someone other than the bios. Perhaps we should all be looking for adoption specialists when we're evaluating counselors.