Sorry about your frustration. I think that you are right about NOT allowing the visit memorial day weekend...It is a holiday, family stuff ect.ect. Why let her potentially ruin it. Talk to your hubby about "compromise"..you are not saying NEVER..just not for this particular weekend.

I can so relate. My dd came to my home after rehab and it lasted about 4 days. Found out she was contacting her dh and that was against our agreement. Big blowup and made her leave. We basically did not speak to each other until 1 mo ago. She did speak with kids and they have had visitation thru a third party organization. She is slowly trying to work her way back into my life. I want to believe that it is for the right reasons, but I also know that it is probably not. I like your husband tend to want to give in. I just realized this weekend that my whole mood changes when she is part of my life and not in a good way. It seems like it works best when we have no contact with each other. Is there anyone you could get to supervise her visit with the kids? It would give you a little time away and you could set it up where you don't have contact with her.

Believe it or not, for the first few weeks out of rehab, she's fine to leave with the kids. She's actually a wonderful mother when she isn't using. We find there's a window of no more than a month when we can leave the kids with her -- and we plan to do it next weekend (my husband agreed that Memorial Day isn't the best, since her brothers and sister-in-law are furious with her the same way we are. It would ruin the holiday).

It's just amazing how she turns up just when we think life is going well, and I know this time she's manipulating us again. But to be honest, we manipulate her, too, because if she's straight she can babysit for us. As far as I'm concerned she owes us that much ;-0