Grandparents Raising Children Support Group

This community is dedicated to grandparents who are the primary caregivers of their grandchildren. In cases where the parents are not willing or able to provide adequate care for their children, grandparents may take on the role of primary caregivers. Join the support group to find support, share your experience, and get advice from other members.

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mamabear65 09/08/2013

I took one dauhter to court and ended up with shared custody of gd. She lives with mom but visits me all but one weekend a month. And I get her every other week in the summer. I also have full rights to all medical and school decisions.

The problem is now with her sister. She is 35 with a 8 yr old daughter. Never married but gets some child support. Refuses to work and home schools her daughter. Since she has no real income she lives with anyone that will take her in. She is currently with her sister mentioned above. Sister does not want her and only has one bedroom apt. I have extra room but it is my other g.d. room. And daughter refuses to live with me because I have rules/guidlines to follow. If sister kicks her out they will be homeless. We do not want that but I already have full plate with older g.d.

I do not want this child in foster care but do not know what else to do. We have called "dad" and he does nothing. I also do not want to lose seeing this child. I love her dearly. I spent all my savings getting help for first g.d and hve no money left for lawyers/court ect.

Does anyone know what I can do for my g.daughter? Thank you.

deleted_user 09/08/2013

Then one day the 8 yr old will ask why me why didn't I get the same as my cousin. There is just no easy answer. I feel so bad as I am here for my 2 lttle ones and was for the oldest one but the twins I feel are left out cause they live w/there Dad and are only her 1 or 2 times a month. The whys just go on and on. There are Mothers ?? who will keep one child and not the other.
What does that say to the one they let go??? that's my soap box for tonight.

mamabear65 09/08/2013

I think you truly know how I feel and what I am going through.

GMaWilli 09/09/2013

If the state intervenes & takes custody of her, can't you get licensed & start getting monthly payments for her care? What about TANF??

Snippy 09/10/2013

Sometimes it is not the money, it is that we are just worn out. We are not 20 or 30 we are older and can only do so much. What happens to these wonderful GC when our bodies wear out.

GMaWilli 09/10/2013

If she should end up in a foster home, you should still be able to have her for visits. You would need to contact the agency in charge & let them know your wishes. I fostered my gs for 3.5 yrs before I adopted him & his other gma in the next state has always gotten him every other weekend.

mamabear65 09/10/2013

GMaWilli- I got custody of first g.d. by going to court. did not have to be licensed and still got a small check for her.
Glad to hear I can get visits if she goes to foster care but still hate to see that happen. You hear so many stories about foster care.

Snippy: You got that right. I feel so old and tired with all this going on.

scgramma 09/10/2013

If she goes to foster care you can contact agent y and they should place her with you . Not much you can do until that happens. I let my dd know I would be willing to get my gd if she wanted me too. A couple weeks of homelessness and she called me to come get her. It's been 7 months and she's still here

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