Grandparents Raising Children Support Group
This community is dedicated to grandparents who are the primary caregivers of their grandchildren. In cases where the parents are not willing or able to provide adequate care for their children, grandparents may take on the role of primary caregivers. Join the support group to find support, share your experience, and get advice from other members.
After about five months of apparent sobriety/straightness, we've begun to suspect that Pinky is getting high again. Last weekend she was supposed to come down on Saturday morning, but told us she had a stomach ache and her doctor prescribed antibiotics and maybe she'd feel better later. Suddenly around 6:00 she miraculously "recovered" and came down, bearing her own dinner -- a New York strip steak, potato, and peas. A hangover meal if you ask me.
When I asked which antibiotic she was given, she said Bactrim. HAH.
Then yesterday morning she called and my husband answered. He had to hang up on her because she was so high.
Okey-dokey. So now the kids have gotten used to her presence every weekend for five or six months. They probably think she's "better." And the signs are all there that she's getting worse again. I hope she can keep it together until after Christmas, because going away again could devastate them more than if she hadn't gone on the wagon in the first place.
Which makes me lean toward no visitation at all, once they have given up custody. Which is worse: To know that you've "lost" a parent, or to have one coming in and out of your life until you no longer know which end is up?
AAAARRRRGGGGHHHH!
When I asked which antibiotic she was given, she said Bactrim. HAH.
Then yesterday morning she called and my husband answered. He had to hang up on her because she was so high.
Okey-dokey. So now the kids have gotten used to her presence every weekend for five or six months. They probably think she's "better." And the signs are all there that she's getting worse again. I hope she can keep it together until after Christmas, because going away again could devastate them more than if she hadn't gone on the wagon in the first place.
Which makes me lean toward no visitation at all, once they have given up custody. Which is worse: To know that you've "lost" a parent, or to have one coming in and out of your life until you no longer know which end is up?
AAAARRRRGGGGHHHH!
Why are they still given visitation if they are still using???? They wouldn't be allowed to live with us if we were using!!!!!!
Praying for us all Sara.
Oh, they claim "it's for the chiiiiildren," but it's feel good nonsense. What's good for the children is stability, love, consistency, and safety.
Makes me crazy!!!!
As far as child support, we didn't ask for child support. We were honestly just wanted custody, because it is what is best for the gd. The other grandparents fought her in court, won custody and child support. I don't think withholding visitation for someone who hasn't paid child support is necessarily a good thing. If the biological parents were good parents, none of us would be raising our grandchildren. I do think we need to somehow start a change in society. It seems more and more people are taking less and less responsibility in life. It's so sad for the children.
Is the speedy Pinky who talks nonstop and does 10 loads of laundry in an hour high? Is it the slow Pinky who barely says a word, sleeps all day, and doesn't do anything? Or is it the medium Pinky who does 4 loads of laundry and reads to the kids, but doesn't talk nonstop?
The only way we know for sure is if she slurs her words and acts REALLY stupid.
It's both #1 & #2. The non-stop talking and 10 loads of laundry are symptoms of a binge high (getting high and only coming down somewhat before getting high again); the sleeping all the time and doing nothing is the post bing-high aftermath where the person hasn't actively used in a day or a few days; they hit pretty hard and their body is trying to recouperate from the binge. Like a drinking hang-over but lasts a lot longer. If she's acting #1 or #2 you can be fairly sure she's using.
Even the bbs went "huh????" It was totally out of blue, made no sense, and was totally out of character. He didn't even ask to speak to gs. I figured he was prolly high. Opinions? (as long as we're talking about signs of it......)