Grandparents Raising Children Support Group

This community is dedicated to grandparents who are the primary caregivers of their grandchildren. In cases where the parents are not willing or able to provide adequate care for their children, grandparents may take on the role of primary caregivers. Join the support group to find support, share your experience, and get advice from other members.

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SaraBT 08/03/2013

Last week Pinky told me that she saw Lover Boy soliciting a hooker. HAHAHA. How did Pinky know, if she wasn't in that neighborhood to begin with?

She confronted him with it and he "backhanded her three times." So Pinky said she was finished with him. Wasn't even going to give him his house key and DVDs back.

HAH!

My husband called me to say that he didn't know what to do. He was on his way to pick her up (she lives on his way home from work) to drive her to our house, and she was "food shopping" with Lover Boy. I told him I was surprised, because of the backhanding. He called her back and said he wasn't going to get her, and he came straight home.

This weekend Pinky called yesterday and asked if her dad would pick her up. I said that as far as I knew he would. She said she'd call him "in the morning" (today) to make arrangements.

She never called him. He tried on his way home, no answer, so he came straight home. She called him long after he had left work -- too late. And she hasn't called since.

I don't give a crap about her. I'm a little miffed that I don't get a break from the kids. Oh, well.

Pinky is probably just off being Pinky again. Typical. She always goes off the rails just as she's about to accomplish something. That has happened every single time. Every. Single. Time.

I guess I have kids 24/7/365 again with no break. Bummer. One more month. One more month. LOL!

mynanny4 08/03/2013

So sorry Sara and I know how you feel. I almost never get a break from these 4 gc. The only time my husband will watch any of them is when I have to take the oldest gd to the dr. Wow, what a wonderful time out for me! He says it is not his job and I should have thought about never getting a break when I took the kids in. Less than 3 weeks until school starts and I can't wait.....but I will still have the youngest one at home so no real breaks for me either.

dianaconroy 08/04/2013

Th good news is you don't have to deal with Pinky. What about adoption?

GMJan 08/04/2013

I know how you feel. I was finally comfortable enough to let my daughter keep GD overnite at her new apartment. I went to pick GD up after work one day and found DD asleep with a man and GD no where in sight. DD didn't even know where she was, at the neighbors was all she would say, 14 yr old girl in charge at neighbors. No one was at the neighbors. I drove around her neighborhood for 15 minutes until I found GD walking by herself. The older girl had left her. Mine is 9. My DD could not understand why I was upset, plus I had said no men when GD was visiting. So no breaks but GD is safe.

daisydduck 08/04/2013

Wouldn't it be cheaper and less of a hassle to hire a nanny??? lol

SaraBT 08/04/2013

It probably would, Daisy! HAHAHA!

The good news is church camp, and my stepson and his wife have a terrific camper. They've been taking one kid each weekend, which means we have two. Two is SO much better than three! LOL

mayanana 08/10/2013

Have you heard anything from Pinky recently?

SaraBT 08/10/2013

My husband insisted on bringing her down Wednesday - I suspect he wanted to check on her. Sure enough, she seemed high to us, and slept all day and all night. And she had a #2 accident in bed while she was sleeping!!!!!!!!!!!! She told her daughter her doctor had "upped her prescription," then told me it was Taco Bell.

Mmm-hmmm.

Our middle granddaughter asked me if I thought Mommy was "different," and I said, "yes she is." But I also said we didn't know what was going on.

By the next morning she was fine, but then she said she had a toothache and had to go home, so my husband took her back. We haven't had a chance to discuss it yet, but I'm sure he'll have some opinions.

No question in my mind. She was high.

Snippy 08/11/2013

So where do we turn, even if you put them out they drive you freaking nuts. Right now I hate/love my son. My husband thought I needed a break and I did so bad so i went on the truck with him for five days and he messed up the freaking minute my back was turned. A doctor told him two weeks ago that he was on the wrong medication and along with his Graves Disease he is not able to make rational decisions. I think he is using that as an excuse.

Snippy 08/11/2013

If anyone is seeing a lot of mental issues along with what is going on please check out some thyroid articles go to the hypothyroidism site here cause the thyroid will cause irrational thought and depression. I to have Graves disease but unlike my son i take care of myself . Your thyroid being to low will cause major depression and a strange thought process. It has been found that people with bi polar symptons have a low thyroid.

deleted_user 08/11/2013

It's a crazy endless cycle!!

You handle it so much better than I do.

Thinking of you, Sara. Those kids are soooo blessed to have you!

dianaconroy 08/14/2013

Wow...after all this time she relapses again? I think it's smart to have a family meeting. Although I would cut visitation way down. Should it be decided that visits need to continue. Good luck in your meeting.

SaraBT 08/14/2013

Thanks, Diana. Pinky looks like a skeleton, and my husband thinks she isn't long for this world. I kind of think so, too. As you said, after all this time? I don't know if she can get back on track. The big thing was when she transitioned from the shelter into her own apartment. No more checks and balances.

Pinky really does need to be confined or put on a leash. She just can't handle life on her own, but she thinks she's just fine, so there's nothing any of us can do but minimize the impact to the kids.

I suppose I should feel sad, but those days are long over :-(

mommagain 08/14/2013

wow this is really sad for the kids... let us know how is goes.

GMaWilli 08/14/2013

That is one of the most frustrating parts to me, how they continue year after year thinking we are stupid & that we don't know when they are high. That we don't know the diffrrence between tired & high, or that we buy into their million & one other cover-up attempts. Your kids are old enough to know the difference. My 6 year old asked his "dad" what was wrong with his eyes. It's so maddening. Sorry you're on another DIP in the roller coaster......

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