Grandparents Raising Children Support Group
This community is dedicated to grandparents who are the primary caregivers of their grandchildren. In cases where the parents are not willing or able to provide adequate care for their children, grandparents may take on the role of primary caregivers. Join the support group to find support, share your experience, and get advice from other members.
Why is is that no matter what I do for my daughter, it's never good enough. I offer to buy her an outfit for job hunting, she rants about how one outfit is not enough, she needs new clothes. Why?
She's at her friends more than she's here, not even sure if she lives here or not. She'll be 18 this month.She has a GED, She has no job. We bought her sister clothes... why not, she's 16 , and entering college as a freshman on Friday?
This completely ignores the fact the soon to be 18yo has a 11 month old son I spend alot of money on for diapers, clothes, food, furniture, dss court battles, 350 paid visitation in July, 135 paid visitation on friday, if it weren't for me, her son would be adopted out by DSS.
Damnit why am I so stupid? Why do I think she should or will ever appreciate anything I do? It's never enough.
Please tell me how to stop expecting anything but grief from her.
She's at her friends more than she's here, not even sure if she lives here or not. She'll be 18 this month.She has a GED, She has no job. We bought her sister clothes... why not, she's 16 , and entering college as a freshman on Friday?
This completely ignores the fact the soon to be 18yo has a 11 month old son I spend alot of money on for diapers, clothes, food, furniture, dss court battles, 350 paid visitation in July, 135 paid visitation on friday, if it weren't for me, her son would be adopted out by DSS.
Damnit why am I so stupid? Why do I think she should or will ever appreciate anything I do? It's never enough.
Please tell me how to stop expecting anything but grief from her.
deleted_user
oh sweetie, do I have one of those as well. For the past 8 yrs; my daughter has been arrested 8 times, been given 6 cars and has lost her home and belongings 4 times. My ex husband and I have spent all of our savings trying to help keep them going. But in the end the men in her life seem to mean more to her than her 3 children. We stopped when she was staying in a hotel ( that we paid for) with 2 men. AHHHHHHHH!! She told me and her dad to MIND OUR BUSINESS.......I said you got that.
deleted_user
I here what your saying I have been there and done it for two daughters. Also have the oldest daughters son. I was going crazy with paying for things, getting out of trouble so on and so on. After five years of being used I had it. All i was doing was enabling them, it had to stop. , and thats what I did stopped it all together.My grandson is what matters now, because they sure didn't care. people tell me they have to hit rock bottom before they can see the light. well if they have people helping them stay above they will never see the light. You need to stop letting her make you feel bad, put that wall up, and tell her no. You are not alone, there are people that care. vent to me if you need to. Stay strong. Susan
deleted_user
I don't know how to help you...just know been there done that, the roller coaster ride is terrible. Tough love didn't work, just kept me up all night. I got him to move to another state, it has helped. Pray and see your self as you are praying handing her ove to God, set her right into his big hands. It'll help you, give you peace. It is about the only ting that got me throught he rough periods. I was at peace each time I did it and I did it alot. Each time I found my self stressed over it all I would do it again. I know sounds corny, but it worked. Does she use drugs or drink? Good luck!
deleted_user
I guess I must be an awful Mother, because as soon as my daughter abandoned her child for a man I gave up on her. You might as well say I have disowned her. I won't talk to her at all. The last time I talked to her she had me in tears because she thinks she deserves to have the child back. I don't feel she deserves anything back. I will fight her getting the child back for as long as I am able.
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