I understand how you feel. Back when my son still had unsupervised visits (in my home during the day only), I asked my caseworker if my son could visit at my home for an overnight once in awhile SUPERVISED by me. She said she didn't see any problem with that because I would be in the home. She gave her ok. We had my son for 2 overnights in about 2 months. When we went for our next administrative case review with the State and my son mentioned spending the night, the reviewer said she would have to report that to the state and made an issue of it. Caseworker then, of course, said NO MORE overnights!!!! But it scared me because I was afraid they might use that as a reason to take my GS out of my care, even though the caseworker was the one who told me we could do it!!!! AND, I'm not sure the caseworker admitted to the reviewer that she gave her permission, or if she just let it seem like we had done that on our own. At any rate, nothing came of it, thank God. But, I like to keep things in writing. I make requests of my CW by email and then keep all emails on my computer so I have proof about what I've asked and what I've been told - in the event something does happen that might jeapordize my GS's placement with me. You can just never be too careful. I completely understand where you're coming from.

And PS ~ that sounds like so much fun what you did with/for your grandkids. Those are the kinds of things kids never forget.

GMa,

Thanks....I did have alot of fun! I haven't heard back from the email I sent my daughter. I told her if she wants me at the visit to forward my email with her consent to the parent aide and have me copied. You are so right about getting everything in writting with those people! Maybe my daughter would like to just have the visit with the kids on her own, then I don't have to worry about if this was correct or not. Boy I sure would take whatever I can with seeing those kids.

I can only imagine..........I miss mine when he goes every other weekend to visit his other grandma. You may be right, too. Your daughter might want the one-on-one time. Is she working a service plan to get them back? Is she taking random drug screens and passing them? My GS's mother has never passed a drug screen in the 2.5 years since all of this started. I really have to wonder if it wouldn't be better at some point to say, "No further contact until you have passed a certain # of drug screens." I wonder if it would be better for the bio parents? If they would be more inclined to get and stay clean & sober. My GS's mom can still see him even though she's using dope every day. She has a very high tolerance since she's been using so long, so she's NEVER seemingly high when she comes to visit and she behaves perfectly nicely, but you can see the scars and marks all up and down her hands and arms and you can tell by looking at her when she's worse and when she's doing a little less. It's really sad, and at some point, my GS is going to start asking more questions about things like the bruises and marks. My son has visited him when he's been under the influence, too. I just think it would be better all the way around if they gave them a reasonable amount of time to work on getting clean, but then after, say 6 months, if they're still not passing drug screens, cut off the contact. It might motivate the parents?? It's frustrating.