Grandparents Raising Children Support Group
This community is dedicated to grandparents who are the primary caregivers of their grandchildren. In cases where the parents are not willing or able to provide adequate care for their children, grandparents may take on the role of primary caregivers. Join the support group to find support, share your experience, and get advice from other members.
I am so very sad today. After this year of spending every single day loving and struggling to protect and nurture GD, she informed me that she is moving out when she turns 18 in March. She was not angry in anyway. She was telling me which wallpaper she'd like to change to in her room and I asked if she was going to stay with us in a hopeful voice.
She informed me that if the pedophile was in prison (She calls him "my daddy," I call him by his first name which takes great restraint.) Then she will move in with pedophile's girlfriend who calls her daughter.
Keep in mind she hasn't seen this monster since she was 3 1/2 yo and has no memory of him. He and crazy girlfriend appeared in her life in June of this year.
Yesterday I took GD for another blood test since some of last week's were abnormal. Then we drove to first appointment with new therapist, referred to us by new psychiatrist. GD sat there stiffly and angrily and I fell apart sobbing. That went well.
Then we had to meet a child protection worker after. We agreed to meet her in a lobby area of large clinic. I do not know which of the many mandated reporters called them. She was very kind and stated there was a new law enacted in 2012 that mandated terminating parental rights in cases of bios convicted of sexual abuse. Wonderful new law! But too late to protect my GD! I tried to have his rights terminated when she was little, but was informed that he had not been charged with molesting her and was entitled to his parental rights.
Then we had to meet with the victim advocate who was also very kind. GD told her she wished no one had ever found out. :(
Picture me running around screaming and ripping out my hair.
She informed me that if the pedophile was in prison (She calls him "my daddy," I call him by his first name which takes great restraint.) Then she will move in with pedophile's girlfriend who calls her daughter.
Keep in mind she hasn't seen this monster since she was 3 1/2 yo and has no memory of him. He and crazy girlfriend appeared in her life in June of this year.
Yesterday I took GD for another blood test since some of last week's were abnormal. Then we drove to first appointment with new therapist, referred to us by new psychiatrist. GD sat there stiffly and angrily and I fell apart sobbing. That went well.
Then we had to meet a child protection worker after. We agreed to meet her in a lobby area of large clinic. I do not know which of the many mandated reporters called them. She was very kind and stated there was a new law enacted in 2012 that mandated terminating parental rights in cases of bios convicted of sexual abuse. Wonderful new law! But too late to protect my GD! I tried to have his rights terminated when she was little, but was informed that he had not been charged with molesting her and was entitled to his parental rights.
Then we had to meet with the victim advocate who was also very kind. GD told her she wished no one had ever found out. :(
Picture me running around screaming and ripping out my hair.
When Pinky was 14 we put her in a rehab. Then we tried again when she was 16. Then she ran away from home with a drug dealer. Eventually we got her three kids to raise.
At some point, and this sounds awful, we just stopped caring. We never stopped loving her, but she was so determined to do the wrong things that we had to detach in order to keep our own sanity and keep our own lives from turning into chaos.
After all that we did for her, in the end nothing mattered. It is a very sad situation. Pinky is now almost 40 and ended up in an ER, and they're putting her in yet another rehab.
All because she insisted, all of her life, to make the wrong choices. I hope your granddaughter comes to her senses before it's too late.
My mom told me a long time ago not to die everyday. It, whatever the it was that I was facing, may never happen and I would have wasted time dying from the pain and not living and enjoying life now.
I am praying that you will enjoy your GD every day and not fear for tomorrow. Fear is a thief. Don't let it steal your joy, today.