Grandparents Raising Children Support Group
This community is dedicated to grandparents who are the primary caregivers of their grandchildren. In cases where the parents are not willing or able to provide adequate care for their children, grandparents may take on the role of primary caregivers. Join the support group to find support, share your experience, and get advice from other members.
I have not been on here in a long time. So this is my story in a nutshell.
Hubby and I have had custody of my almost 3 yr old GS since he was 9 months old. Bio dad is deceased and bio mom, my daughter, could never get it together enough to even earn unsupervised visitations and has since had her parental rights terminated.
I am almost 67 yrs old, so this has not been easy. I do realize it's never easy, no matter your age. I tire out easier than when my kids were little.
Hubby and I have been approved for adoption and this should be happening within the next few months.
I'm supposed to be retiring this year, but with a child to raise I'm not sure I can afford to retire - on the other and, once we adopt him, the state will no longer help pay for his daycare.
I feel selfish in wanting to keep this child, knowing I am much too old for the task at hand. I'm feeling that maybe we should have let him go to a young family. Does/did anyone ese feel like this?
How are we to deal with all this emotional crap the bio's put in our lap?
It's the children who suffer, God bless them.
Hubby and I have had custody of my almost 3 yr old GS since he was 9 months old. Bio dad is deceased and bio mom, my daughter, could never get it together enough to even earn unsupervised visitations and has since had her parental rights terminated.
I am almost 67 yrs old, so this has not been easy. I do realize it's never easy, no matter your age. I tire out easier than when my kids were little.
Hubby and I have been approved for adoption and this should be happening within the next few months.
I'm supposed to be retiring this year, but with a child to raise I'm not sure I can afford to retire - on the other and, once we adopt him, the state will no longer help pay for his daycare.
I feel selfish in wanting to keep this child, knowing I am much too old for the task at hand. I'm feeling that maybe we should have let him go to a young family. Does/did anyone ese feel like this?
How are we to deal with all this emotional crap the bio's put in our lap?
It's the children who suffer, God bless them.
It's just so sad that he has no other grandparents, so no one to spoil him. Not even aunts or uncles on his dad's side of family. The g-parents are deceased and aunts/uncles are addicts.. As everyone here knows, we have been robbed of being grandparents when we are raising the kids. It seems my other grown kids are very busy raising their kids to spend any time with him. I do have 1 grown granddaughter who on occasion has included him, but she's raising her 2 babies.
Our adoption will be through DHS, so we have worked very closely with them. Unfortunately, Iowa offers nothing in the way of support for grandparents raising g-kids. I have even contacted the foster children program, but no support groups at all. At least that is what they have told me. The daycare assistance we are receiving will end as soon as we adopt him. Daycare expenses will eat up the bigger portion of my pay.
I guess we all just do what we can for the love of these sweet babies.
I did read your post Daisey, and your struggles as well. Bless your heart!
At least our grandkids will know we never ave up on them.