Grandparents Raising Children Support Group
This community is dedicated to grandparents who are the primary caregivers of their grandchildren. In cases where the parents are not willing or able to provide adequate care for their children, grandparents may take on the role of primary caregivers. Join the support group to find support, share your experience, and get advice from other members.
I used to resent the fact that I suddenly was responsible for kids life's that weren't in the plan. Now I have to admit that I don't resent that at all, because they feel very much like my children. What I'm resenting are the bios and their sense of entitlement . Last weekend my SD jerked me around all week up until the very last minute when she cancelled. She kept calling and calling to see if i could change day, time, etc, she called so much that I started to question her motives. The last time I saw her was for our youngest birthday. She gave him a full on party with two friends I've never met. Same thing that week she kept calling trying to figure out if I was coming alone and at one point suggested that I do. Of course I didn't. Then she wouldn't give us the address until the very last moment . It's getting to the point were I'm suspecting something is up. Then next weekend we plan the visit for Saturday and now she saids it's changed to Sunday. My husband and I went to get maze to protect ourselves. She comes across as extremely nice and grateful and is even calling hr mother to tell her how grateful she is. I'm not buying it. Thoughts?
Now she's a bit more normal. I really think she's fighting getting high, even if she's doing it now and then if you know what I mean. But she's still not "on" the way she was when she was really, truly in recovery.
But yeah, she'd jerk us around just like that. So I'd think something's up for sure.
I forgot that I used to do that with Pinky -- mostly just to jerk her chain (one of the few pleasures I have left with her - LOLOL) and watch her squirm.
I still do that if I can. If she wants me to meet her bus and misses it, oh well, she'll have to call when she gets to our town and see if anyone is available to pick her up. If she sleeps late and doesn't get on the agreed-upon bus, oh, well, then, maybe next weekend.
When Pinky isn't using she's almost always on schedule -- so I really do think something seems to be going on...
I won't meet nutcase mom alone at all. I won't even meet her anywhere that is not very, very public. She has accused me of slapping her at one of her supervised visits at my house. This immediately led to my not supervising her visits any longer. Now she is stuck with not being able to see the kids at all. Which has not hurt my feelings at all! They do better when the parents aren't around to throw chaos into their lives.
It would take 15 emails to get the plan straight on when she would be visiting and then she would still be late or not show or have to leave early. Now if anything is "planned" I tell her this is what is happening, you can be there or not. I am not changing my plans to accomadate her.
I think the big picture that they miss is that they are responsible for what has happened and why they don't have their kids. It is not my doing, or DEFACS doing, or the courts doing or anybody or any agencies doing, it is theirs. All I hear is how I took her kids cause I made her look crazy. She has yet to admit that she lost her kids due to using Meth and not taking care of her kids and DV. Victim, victim, victim.......
My grandson's bio mom, is crazy, and my son tells me to always watch my back. She can lurk and wait to do something to me and the baby. It is sad because we have to make sure no one can see into our house because our house is backed up to a main street with a tall brick wall that I think the City built long ago. Some one can get something to stand on and look over into our backyard and our back windows. We got shutters and put lights on every night because of her.
Take care, and I think it's a good idea to have maze...