I just noticed -- it was scgramma who posted about the book. Thanks for the recommendation! I look forward to the book AND the workbook! I suspect we have a case of BPD in my husband's daughter. No. I don't suspect. I know -- she has every single symptom except the cutting.

When I heard about it and researched it, I was amazed. It descibes my daughter so well.Finally a reason for her behavior. Now I feel allowed to love her, despite her behavior. I MUST however, establish the bounderies, enforce them, and protect the grands as much as I can from her behavior. It drives me crazy when all DSS can say is well her drug sceens are clean.
HELLO? I just wish you could test someone for this with a blood test or something.

Thanks for the site. I have been researching BP because of Katie's problems, but I see my son so clearly. I took him to therapist when he was young but they didn't get it. He started drinking and drugs at a young age and was in prison at 18. It makes me so angry and sad that I tried to get him help and they just wouldn't believe me when I took him in. He tried to commit suicide at 16. I took him to the hospital, they kept him 3 days and released him still with no dx. Katie's mom has BPD but didn't like the way the meds made her feel. They both self medicate. With both parents having BP I read that their children stood a 70% chance of having it too.

Apparently BPD was classified as a catch-all disorder until very, very recently. Many therapists are still reluctant to deal with it because it can drain their patience. But I believe great advances in treatment have been made since the 1990s, and the site referenced above has stories of people who are improving dramatically.

I think many people with BPD abuse substances instead of cutting themselves. Same thing, in the end...

My former therapist told me my ex had a personality disorder, so I'm very anxious to go to this site and do some research. My ex is a recovering alcoholic (as far as I know anyway; he's been in prison since 2002) and my son is a heroin addict and his body language and personality is so much like his dad's, it scares me. Now I'm raising the GS, so I really need this info. Thanks for sharing.

I want to apolgize for mistakes in my last post. Katie's bio mom has
Bi Polar Disorder.

I, too, believe my dd has BPD, and it is a difficult disorder to treat. It is my hope that while she is incarcerated that she will get the help she needs because she wouldn't do it on her own. She didn't even like it when I told her I thought she had it.

Denial is more than a river in Egypt:)

I worked six years on a psych unit and mental illness is more harmful to a family than cancer. Princess Diana was said to have Bordlerline Personality Disorder and you could tell by the razor slices on her thighs and arms. Research and medications on mental illness have come a long way so dont jump to conclusions. Diagnosis are complex. You may notice similarities but that does not mean that is diagnosis. The biggest thing I learned was that families had to use tough love to get the ill person to comply. Good luck

[quote]I worked six years on a psych unit and mental illness is more harmful to a family than cancer/[/quote]


So true . . . and I also agree that very few people are ever diagnosed with just one personality disorder. Most are a combination of several. The workings of the brain are still a great mystery, so pharmaceutical treatment is often a regime of trying different drugs until the right one(s) and dosages are found.

Many times I have defended my daughter on here when the advice I was given was to cut ties and this is why I have defended her, she too is has BP, BPD I feel a lot of the things she does is not her fault. While she chooses not to take meds that is her fault but are these kids really in a possession to decide what is best for them? The government thinks so but then again they dont have to deal with them.

The challenge, granna, is that it's a vicious cycle. The person knows they have a problem but either they refuse to admit it or refuse to stick with the therapy -- because their mind is sick.

However, I contend that every human being should be held accountable for their actions. Here's an example:

I once knew two couples who both had late teenagers with Down's Syndrome. One babied her son; when I would talk to him, Mommy would answer - even though he could carry on a conversation quite well. The other couple's daughter was sort of left to be herself. She held a job, purchased her own jewelry, and could REALLY converse with me. It seemed obvious that even with her disability, she was treated the same way she would have had she an IQ of 127. The one who was babied acted much less mature -- yet I sensed that both shared about the same IQ.

People pretty much do what's expected of us. Give us a law and we'll follow it. Give us a loophole and we'll drive that tractor-trailer through it :-)

Having BP or BPD doesn't and shouldn't excuse rude behavior, in my opinion. In fact, by holding them to the same standards we hold others to, I believe we are actually helping them to adjust to society. I could be wrong -- my books just came today and I haven't read them yet :-)

I'm almost sure my daughter has BPD. I went to the web site that was mentioned and it all fits her personality. She would never admit that she had a problem and would not get help, choosing to self-medicate. She is now in jail for drugs and now chaims to have seen the light, wants to change and get her girls back. Gee, I heard that the last time she was arrested. She is 32 and can not blame this on any one but herself. Help has been offered but when you think everyone else has the problem, it does no good. Anyway, three little girls have no mommy now, I have one, good bio-dad has the oldest, and the baby is in foster care. The one I am raising and the baby have the same bio-dad, he is currently in jail .

Just remember that the drugs do their own damage and the drug abuse can simulate or mask symptoms. A doctor needs to diagnose whether it is a psychiatric disorder or if it is because of drug abuse. They cannot always be treated in the same way.

I have BPD. It is a very hard thing to live with. There are some good points. 1. as you grow older you this illness gets less and less probmatic. 2. after a year of a weekly training on how to deal with my own issues and how to react to things in a good way I did much much better.

I believe that each and every person has BPD but some on you understand much better than others to control it.

I remember to this day the first day that i got up and didn't want to die. It was a really remarkable day. To day I am glad that some one was always there to call 911 and they understood enough to care and not think i was just playing a joke or something. I would of missed my gkids and God only knows what would happen to them if I wasn't here.

Grandee,

I am glad you were able to learn to work through your BPD. It is not an easy thing to do.

Your story gives me hope that maybe my daughter will be able to control hers as well.