Grandparents Raising Children Support Group

This community is dedicated to grandparents who are the primary caregivers of their grandchildren. In cases where the parents are not willing or able to provide adequate care for their children, grandparents may take on the role of primary caregivers. Join the support group to find support, share your experience, and get advice from other members.

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/ Grandparents Raising Children Support Group

Bios who want their kids back

SaraBT
SaraBT
It just occurred to me that, if the bios want their kids back, don't they have to pay child support for all of the years we took care of them?

Does anyone know the answer to this? I know that in NJ, if a bio comes out of the woodwork and wants custody, they have to pay all outstanding child support (among other things they have to do) before they can petition for custody.
daisydduck
daisydduck
I think it depends if child support was asked for and ordered by court. The more I get involved in my research, the more I feel it is all about money and control w/bios and has nothing to do with best interest of children.
deleted_user
deleted_user
if my dd got it together and wanted her dd back i would be so delighted! child support would be the last thing i would care about.
BuffyS
BuffyS
I think in general, child support is not retroactive. From the date a judge signs the order for child support, the money clock starts ticking. Likewise, a parent can't go back to modify child support and ask that the child support from X date in the past be increased and pro-rated because the other parent got a raise or something. The change in payment amount starts when the judge signs the paper and into the future.

BTW: the threat of being charged child support was the final straw that made my daughter and her ex both agree to my husband and me adopting their child. We already had custody and being granted child support was virtually guaranteed. They were both more interested in keeping their money for themselves than in looking long-term to getting their child back.
BuffyS
BuffyS
Oh, and if a parent comes out of the woodwork, I'm pretty sure they're being charged by the state to repay any medicaid, subsidized housing, etc. that their ex required because they weren't receiving child support. Or, if they fell behind in court-ordered child support, they have to catch up on that.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I know in PA the parents have to pay the back child support even if they get their kids back. It's money due and court ordered... pure and simple.
daisydduck
daisydduck
You have to have that court order first in order to collect.
SaraBT
SaraBT
When we consulted an attorney before our custody hearing, she said that, in NJ at least, if one of the fathers should suddenly decide he wants custody, he would have to:

1) Get a DNA test to prove paternity
2) Get psychological counseling (along with the grandchild)
3) Pay all back child support (although since we never asked for it, I wonder how that would or would not apply. Drat.)
4) Start supervised, then unsupervised visitation
5) Then apply for custody, which he may or may not get.

I suppose because we never demanded child support we would never get it. However, we were told that the welfare systems of all states the "mother" lived in would demand payment before any custody was returned to any bio parent.
BuffyS
BuffyS
That's what I was referring to in post #4.