Grandparents Raising Children Support Group
This community is dedicated to grandparents who are the primary caregivers of their grandchildren. In cases where the parents are not willing or able to provide adequate care for their children, grandparents may take on the role of primary caregivers. Join the support group to find support, share your experience, and get advice from other members.
I don't think ddmom realizes when DSS closes the case, she will no longer have an attorney and will have to pay to go back to court to get visitation and/or custody. I guess maybe I'm the one whose out of touch with reality. Maybe she IS happy with me having him, and her not having to do anything she doesn't want to do. That includes working and supporting him. Maybe she really IS happy just coming over every day. She doesn't have to pay daycare. She doesn't have to buy diapers. She doesn't have to tussle with health insurance issues. She can pretty much see him as much as she wants, so whats the downside?
I would never have been satisfied with not having my children. If the only thing standing between me and my kids was a job I would do anything to get that job. I have had him since October. That's pleny of time for her to get a JOB.
She keeps talking about getting him back, but she hasn't followed through with being able to support him. Now she's pregnant again, and I just can't see her ever being able to support 2 kids, especially with her refusal to get a job, her fiance's inability to keep a job, or get a decent one, and another baby in december....
How blind am I ? if she wasn't happy with the current situation she would change it right? Court is in just 9 days and at least I will be done with DSS. There is no point in my delaying the closing, I get custody. After that, I won't have any more DSS visits to worry about.
I would never have been satisfied with not having my children. If the only thing standing between me and my kids was a job I would do anything to get that job. I have had him since October. That's pleny of time for her to get a JOB.
She keeps talking about getting him back, but she hasn't followed through with being able to support him. Now she's pregnant again, and I just can't see her ever being able to support 2 kids, especially with her refusal to get a job, her fiance's inability to keep a job, or get a decent one, and another baby in december....
How blind am I ? if she wasn't happy with the current situation she would change it right? Court is in just 9 days and at least I will be done with DSS. There is no point in my delaying the closing, I get custody. After that, I won't have any more DSS visits to worry about.
If your daughter has not done any of what the court system has ask and if it has been close to a year or a year more then laikely they will term. her rights.
I wish that is where we were. It has been 3 and a half years and we still are being put through hell and what is worse then anything the little one is suffering because of it all.
Have you concidered setting only certain days for her to come by instead of just poping in. Is it a court order for her to pay child support?
I really have a hard time understanding these moms to, I just do not get it at all.
Good luck in court. You are in my prayers and thoughts.
It's been nearly two years for us. I have permanent guardianship, but they still have parental rights. My lawyer explained that soc serv. likes to keep it that way so when they do have employment they have to pay child support. If their parental rights are terminated, then they don't pay any child support, insurance, etc. So the courts keep the parental rights going as long as they can. It sounds like it's more of a threat tool in this state than an actual real threat to the parents. Unless you actually adopt the child, which is pretty hard to get through unless the court deems that both parents are beyond hope.
That's why I'm facing issues with moving right now, as well. As long as they still have parental rights, they pretty much run my life, which doesn't really seem right, especially given the amount of time they spend with my g/s.
There are ways around some of these issues, but they always involve courts and lawyers, as I am finding out. AND fighting those people most dear to you - your own sons and daughters and possibly other family members. It is not a fun situation to be in, but it is a necessary one. So hang in there, and remember, you are doing it all for your g/c. Give them lots of hugs and kisses to get you through! :)