Gay Men's Challenges Support Group
This community is dedicated to the challenges that gay men face, both between the partners in a relationship and from other influences (family, society, etc.). Find support and talk to others who may be facing the same challenges, and share your experience.
Hey guys,
So I'm basically just a mess. I'm 20, and have never dated, never been kissed, never felt loved. I have two parents with disapproving attitudes toward LGBT people, even despite the the fact that my mother has two sisters and a brother who are gay. I'm not out to them, and that burden only gets more and more awkward. I was sexually abused as a child by a male older cousin, and despite the whole bear culture, am pretty much unattractive. I suffer from clinical depression and have at times just wanted to completely give up on life itself.
In spite of all this, I actually want to find love. I don't know how, I've never had any success, and I'm an aspie, which explains a lot of my quirks. But I honestly do hope that I'm "the one" for some guy out there, who's the same for me. Some days I just resign myself to my single fate, but other times I do feel a glimmer of hope. What say you? Am I a lost cause or still salvageable?
So I'm basically just a mess. I'm 20, and have never dated, never been kissed, never felt loved. I have two parents with disapproving attitudes toward LGBT people, even despite the the fact that my mother has two sisters and a brother who are gay. I'm not out to them, and that burden only gets more and more awkward. I was sexually abused as a child by a male older cousin, and despite the whole bear culture, am pretty much unattractive. I suffer from clinical depression and have at times just wanted to completely give up on life itself.
In spite of all this, I actually want to find love. I don't know how, I've never had any success, and I'm an aspie, which explains a lot of my quirks. But I honestly do hope that I'm "the one" for some guy out there, who's the same for me. Some days I just resign myself to my single fate, but other times I do feel a glimmer of hope. What say you? Am I a lost cause or still salvageable?
philidopolus
First, there is always hope. Never give up, because you never know whats around the next bend. There is someone out there for everyone. I know thats cliche, but its the truth. Please dont give up on life. Its too precious to waste. Your still very young, and can live the life you want to live. As for your parents, I would suggest is they are not approving to hold off on coming out to them, at least until you have a safe place to go or your own place. People on dating websites can be cruel, but there are good guys out there that are looking for love just the same as you. I say give it a try. We all have had bad relationships and good relationships, you just have to dive in and keep trying till you find mr right. Take your time and enjoy the ride and be safe. It can be fun and you'll know mr right when you find him. I hope this helps you in some way.
jajj2018
I would say that if you are looking fro a relationship then you will find it. If you are just sort of waiting around and expecting him to just one day show up by chance meeting you may be waiting a while. You will have to put yourself out there and make sure to be honest with yourself and anyone you plan to meet. There are so many guys that love the bear type. I am a big guy and was in a happy and loving relationship for 19 years. It recently ended but, I would not give up one second we spent together. Never give up on the hope of finding someone to spend your life with because, if that is what you want there is someone out there for you that wants the same thing. I would also say you are very young so enjoy the single life for now and you will be surprised at who might just be in the right place at the right time when you least expect it. Never let yourself get down and if you do just know it is a part of life and the hills and valleys will always be a part of it.
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