First let me say thank you because without this group I probably would have changed my mind and never had the courage to go forward with my decision to have the surgery. Since joining this group I have laughed, cried, cheered and prayed right along with each of you as you have faced your challenges and rejoiced in your victories. I have not had my surgery yet - I'm still patiently waiting for my day and it has been a roller coaster ride of emotions. I've finally got my legs and I am feeling stronger today than ever before because of your wisdom, words of encouragement and candor in sharing the good, the bad and yes the ugly of weight loss surgery.

In saying all that, I have to say this. I know that you have to read the good as well as the bad and that is to be expected so my post is not meant to offend any one going through ups and downs whether surgery related or not. I just can't help being concerend after reading some pretty frightening post from my fellow sisters and brothers who are temporarily facing some anguish due to complications, some are even expressing feelings of remorse and that has me very heavy hearted tonight. Just as the tears began to flow and my fears came racing back, I heard God speak to me and this is what I wanted to share with you.

I am 50 years old and for as long as I can remember no matter what happens negatively in my life (and there has been a lot) i've always found a way to put a positive spin on it. So as much as I know there will be days when I too may doubt my decision, I have to encourage myself as well as you all to keep pressing forward. We've lived the majority of our lives pigeon held to restrictions and limitations. So we made this choice to take control over the weight loss by taking very drastic steps to get it off once and for all. I am reminded of being a child and hearing my mother say anything worth having is worth working for and waiting for. I know i've waited 29 years to get this weight back off of me so when its my turn and the struggles come I will face them with grace and determination and even if i have to do so through my tears, anger, bouts of depression and anxiety, I will put my faith and trust in God to see me through. I've had to over come rape and molestation, depression, suicidal tendencacies related to the aforementioned. Nothing in my life has ever come easy but the joy that has derived out of that pain has made my life so much more worth living. So if I may share that wisdom with you, just hold on and keep repeating to yourselves that anything worth having comes at a cost and no it may not be easy, but the closer you get to your goals you will realize that anything worth having is ever easy, but it is well worth it.

As I humbly type this tonight all i ask of those of you who have gone before me and have encouraged me daily is, plz do not give up and don't look back.

I am sure that there are days when Staying fat/obese looks easier than the challenges you are facing post op but realize that obesity was a comfort zone derived from the pits of hell. For what ever reason we stayed in that zone because we didn't feel worthy enough to come out, in some cases it was a defense mechanism to protect us through some of the most painful phases of our lives.

Here is the question; was there really any comfort in that imaginary shelter of familiarity. When ultimately that safe place could have potentially cost us our lives.

I am a firm believe that what ever time we have left is meant to be full of purpose, adventure, laughter and love. We have been given a new lease on life, so please don't second guess yourselves now just because the going is getting a little tough. You have a winner in you, fight the urge to give up. You must conqeour each challenge like you are fighting the fight of your life. Your victory is within arms reach now this is not the time to give up or give in to fear. It's time to walk in your destiny and I am right here for each and everyone of you.

God bless you all, your sister for life Ms. Tami

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