Welcome! My life afterwards has been awesome! I love not having to carry myself around 24/7. Literally. I can do all kinds of things that I was severely limited with before. It will be 8 years for me in August and I still think RNY has been one of the best choices in my life journey. I haven’t had a single regret. I educated myself and did a lot of prep work both mentally and emotionally. I go out to restaurants every week, just eat a little, and bring the rest home. I usually pull forward my small portion to separate it from the rest. When I am done, I make sure to push the plate away. What I bring home usually lasts for several meals. I get foods that can be reheated. As long as you have a strong, supportive relationship going into this, you should be fine. Shedding the weight changes us so communication is key. It is true that relationships can end for those who don’t have strong relationships to start with. If you are interested, check out the what newbies need to know post for info on what to expect.
https://www.dailystrength.org/group/gastric-bypass-surgery/discussion/what-newbies-need-to-know

I am 53 I am a year after surgery and very happy I had the surgery. I was diabetic and had high blood pressure and am no longer diabetic or on blood pressure meds,. Your spouse will love you just the same as it is what is on the inside they fall in love with. I suggest that they are also very involved in the process. I am married 29 years and my spouse loves me just the same our more. Save your life and enjoy the new you.

Hi there. I had my surgery in May, and it was the best decision I made. Since my surgery I have gone from a size 48 pant to 38 (currently). I have to say that donating all my bigger clothes was such a good feeling I can't wait to get rid of more clothes. I am much less self conscious and I do things more willingly, before I would do stuff but always made a fuss about it. As far as going out to eat and BBQ's, I made the decision that I was not going to let surgery interfere with my "personal" life. My husband was worried about going out with friends and eating around me. I told him that if we are invited somewhere and he wanted to go to say yes. It was my issue to find something that I can eat or I would just drink water. Not saying it was easy but it does get easier. I would tell the people we were out with that I had surgery and why I wasn't eating and luckily they were all understanding and very supportive. As for the relationship, congratulations on your marriage. That could be tough, but if you husband is supportive I think you will be ok. He loves you for who you are and not your size. But maybe you could find someone you can both talk to, I'm sure your doctor can make a recommendation. But remember why you are doing the surgery, for YOU. I know this will be harsh but you have to think about yourself first, and if your husband can't handle the new you than that will be his loss. I hope that isn't the case, and I'd bet it isn't but you do have to keep your health at the forefront of your thought. I know I had the same feelings, even being together 24yrs didn't comfort my thoughts that I would single after surgery, but all the worry didn't amount to anything. We are the same as we were before except I am willing to do more things.

Best of luck to you, Let us know who things go. Feel free to reach out to me if you have any questions.