Gastric Bypass Surgery Support Group
Gastric bypass (GBP) is any of a group of similar operative procedures used to treat morbid obesity, a condition which arises from severe accumulation of excess weight in the form of fatty tissue, and the health problems ("co-morbidities") which result. If you are considering gastric bypass or have had it, join the community where we share our experiences and find support.
Hey everyone!
I'm turning to the wonderful people here on DS in order to deal with my feelings of panic, so thanks for being here (or there) ;)
I've been working for about 2 years waiting for the planets to line up with getting approved etc. for gastric sleeve surgery. Now all of a sudden I have a surgery date for July 25, 2013. It seemed like I always had one more hoop to jump. It was daunting at times and I felt discouraged but I kept plugging along and now here I am - straight up scared!
I researched surgery, right foods and ways to approach the life change that can come with gastric surgery a while ago and it was very helpful to read the posts from all of you here. I felt uplifted, encouraged, sad and a whole range of other emotions including a few good belly laughs. I will be using the eggface website for sure. I know in my head that I'm most likely in grief cycles. I can't seem to talk myself down out of the trees so to speak (think -kitten that climbed a tall tree) AAAK!
For about 4 months now I have been practicing eating slower, not drinking with meals (harder than I gave it credit) sipping water all day (still struggle) I stopped eating fast foods and most all junk foods. I even broke my sugar carb spiral and got off chocolate (2-4 candy bars a day) with the help of dried figs and other more healthy food choices. I have been drinking fresh brewed tea instead of soda. I love the celestial season's bengal spice brewed cold with stivia -it's divine (8 bags in about a gallon of water) I have lost 25 pounds without even trying which is freaking me out too. I'm at 251 lbs now.
My mind is playing aweful bad nasty cruel no good dirty rotten tricks on me. Weight has been seriously problematic for me for at least 20 years now and I find myself wanting to back out. I'm afraid of loosing the foods that I have had a long love affair with. I'm afraid of not being able to turn to food for comfort even though I have been in 2 years of counseling and I understand the process. I guess I haven't discovered what I can do when I need that kind of comfort. I am single, my children are grown and wonderful, I'm even expecting to become a grandmother in December this year which is one of the many reasons I am having gastric surgery (my parents both died too young). I have 3 dogs that fill my life with so much love and we exercize together which works great because they have 4 inch legs and I can keep up with them most of the time! I also have multiple sclerosis -I'm "disabled" so I'm not able to work at my "normal" career job and I still miss this a lot.
Well, to get to it, I'm just still scared even though I have come a long way and I can rationalize a lot of the challenges, fears and other stuff. I have started sabotaging myself, I went to McDonald's twice now, I'm looking longingly at the cookie aisle in the grocery store and my head tells me "it's okay, you are going to have the surgery- get all the goodies now while you can". I bought a 2litre of pepsi next which is deadly to a recovering pepsi junkie like myself. I haven't gotten my nose back in the chocolate bag though, thankfully.
I have been feeling so much better after eating more sensibly and being able to move around. The panic and depressed feelings started ramping up shortly after I had a date set for the surgery. It still feels right and I believe I am making the best and most sound decission to go ahead with surgery. I've been on and done many of the same diet-weight gain roller coaster as so many people here. I am absolutely sure I will have challenges with eating in some way or another.
I'm stopping the crazy food train right now and I know that I don't think as well when i'm eating junk food. I'm still scared though....meow. ?
I'm turning to the wonderful people here on DS in order to deal with my feelings of panic, so thanks for being here (or there) ;)
I've been working for about 2 years waiting for the planets to line up with getting approved etc. for gastric sleeve surgery. Now all of a sudden I have a surgery date for July 25, 2013. It seemed like I always had one more hoop to jump. It was daunting at times and I felt discouraged but I kept plugging along and now here I am - straight up scared!
I researched surgery, right foods and ways to approach the life change that can come with gastric surgery a while ago and it was very helpful to read the posts from all of you here. I felt uplifted, encouraged, sad and a whole range of other emotions including a few good belly laughs. I will be using the eggface website for sure. I know in my head that I'm most likely in grief cycles. I can't seem to talk myself down out of the trees so to speak (think -kitten that climbed a tall tree) AAAK!
For about 4 months now I have been practicing eating slower, not drinking with meals (harder than I gave it credit) sipping water all day (still struggle) I stopped eating fast foods and most all junk foods. I even broke my sugar carb spiral and got off chocolate (2-4 candy bars a day) with the help of dried figs and other more healthy food choices. I have been drinking fresh brewed tea instead of soda. I love the celestial season's bengal spice brewed cold with stivia -it's divine (8 bags in about a gallon of water) I have lost 25 pounds without even trying which is freaking me out too. I'm at 251 lbs now.
My mind is playing aweful bad nasty cruel no good dirty rotten tricks on me. Weight has been seriously problematic for me for at least 20 years now and I find myself wanting to back out. I'm afraid of loosing the foods that I have had a long love affair with. I'm afraid of not being able to turn to food for comfort even though I have been in 2 years of counseling and I understand the process. I guess I haven't discovered what I can do when I need that kind of comfort. I am single, my children are grown and wonderful, I'm even expecting to become a grandmother in December this year which is one of the many reasons I am having gastric surgery (my parents both died too young). I have 3 dogs that fill my life with so much love and we exercize together which works great because they have 4 inch legs and I can keep up with them most of the time! I also have multiple sclerosis -I'm "disabled" so I'm not able to work at my "normal" career job and I still miss this a lot.
Well, to get to it, I'm just still scared even though I have come a long way and I can rationalize a lot of the challenges, fears and other stuff. I have started sabotaging myself, I went to McDonald's twice now, I'm looking longingly at the cookie aisle in the grocery store and my head tells me "it's okay, you are going to have the surgery- get all the goodies now while you can". I bought a 2litre of pepsi next which is deadly to a recovering pepsi junkie like myself. I haven't gotten my nose back in the chocolate bag though, thankfully.
I have been feeling so much better after eating more sensibly and being able to move around. The panic and depressed feelings started ramping up shortly after I had a date set for the surgery. It still feels right and I believe I am making the best and most sound decission to go ahead with surgery. I've been on and done many of the same diet-weight gain roller coaster as so many people here. I am absolutely sure I will have challenges with eating in some way or another.
I'm stopping the crazy food train right now and I know that I don't think as well when i'm eating junk food. I'm still scared though....meow. ?
just keep breathing in and out... and remember, if we weren't scared and all the other emotions, then something would REALLY be wrong!
((HUGS))
Becca
It's really, really normal to be thinking about the changes you'll be making, because it is a life-long commitment. But it is so worth the effort!
I'm more than 2.5 years post-op I'm one of the 70 percent of people who can eat basically anything. I don't dump. Maybe that's because I do everything in moderation. I don't have to avoid sugar, but I choose to do so 95 percent of the time. I don't have to avoid potatoes and pasta and bread. But I choose to 95 percent of the time.
My tastes have changed, and so have my priorities. I love wearing a size six. I love being able to tie my shoes without losing my breath. I can feel my bones. I can be more comfortable in my own skin. Most of all, I love no longer being diabetic or having to deal with GERD. I no longer face my senior years with the expectation of increasingly severe health problems. I can be active.
Life-style changes that I've made for good include keeping a daily food diary, eating six small meals, putting protein first and carbs last, being active and vigilant about getting enough fluids every day. All in all, it seems so little compared to what I have gained.
So. Take a deep breath. Think about all the reasons why you have already done all the hard work. Last of all, give yourself some love and trust. You'll be fine. :I)
Post op isn't a problem. I am not hungry. I had to learn for myself about eating stuff that will make you sick! Dumping is no fun! I am kinda dumb that way.
The surgery works if you follow the plan. It IS NOT the easy way out like some idiots have called it to my face. There's nothing easy about it but it is a tool that will let you lose the wieght and keep it off. That's the key phrase there for me. I chose the RNY becasue I had lost over 100 pounds 3 times and regained it plus some. Now I have a chance to keep it off. In 7 months I have lost 110 pounds and pretty much feel great. Still have some things that don't set well on my pouch but that's ok. They can be avoided.
Only thing I would change now is I would have had the surgery years ago!
Sorry for the long rant. Relax, it will be ok. It is normal to be afraid, this is a big step.
Yes, you will lose some nice weight during this time, but whatever you do, shoo not back out off your surgery. I did this once thinking I can do this without surgery and gained all I had lost plus extra. I have lost a total of about 87 pounds, I went from 5x (tight) too 3x so far. I feel pretty and wonderful.
I wish you the very best, just hang in there. By the way pain after surgery is not that bad.
You can do this, it's just a head game we all have to deal with. I'm 3 weeks out and have no cravings for sugar, carbs, etc. I do crave fruit that I'm slowly introducing back into my diet. Surgery wasn't bad at all and the pain was very manageable.
You will do just fine, think positive thoughts at all times!
9 days until surgery and I can do this. I keep repeating it and I really use the "drive by" until I'm passed it analogy. Thanks again everyone. I have to add that after meeting with the surgery team I feel much more at ease and confident.
I was able to so relate to your post. I am getting close to surgery also and am second guessing my decision. I am going back and forth on whether I should get lapband or bypass now because I am scared of how the bypass is permanent. I am not very excited about the lapbank issues either. I can also relate to " im not going to be able to eat this" syndrome. Matter of fact, what you are expressing is exactly why I joined this support group.
I have a slightly different take than some others. Are you sick of being fat? Are you sick of the yo-yo dieting? Are you tired of being tired?? Can you move the way you want to move? Is there honestly anything you can chew or swallow that is worth the self-hatred you feel when you fail at yet another diet?? I will never drink another Diet Coke (and I was addicted to that stuff for over 20 years). I don't like pizza anymore...and it was my favorite food. I will never eat another quarter pounder with cheese. I will never eat another piece of pie....
None of that makes me sad. I don't feel sorry for myself. I am finally free!!!! Food has no power over me. I have secret super-powers over food!!! I can still enjoy the smells. If i really, really think I need to taste something I will...but I will not put that crap in my body ever again (so, I occasionally taste but don't swallow....kind of like someone at a wine tasting). You know what? I've tasted that stuff before. For me the memory is better than the actual taste.
Before my surgery, I would sit and watch youtube videos of people shrinking after the'd had GBS. I bawled my eyes out...I was so tired of being obese and I was afraid to hope that I could be as successful as some of the people I watched. I came here and read every post for the previous 2 years. Then I squared my shoulders and decided to go for it. I can't tell you how glad I am that I had the courage to go through with the surgery.
A year after I had my surgery I was at a healthy weight. I went from wearing 30/32 to size 4 (now that I've I had my TT, I wear size 2 pants). Around the time of my surgiversary, I got an message from another DS member who had been scheduled for surgery the same week I was. Only, she'd panicked and backed out...and was up another 30 lbs or so. She was miserable!! It was heartbreaking!
Do not let fear keep you from living!!! I remember the first time I went to the mall and realized I could walk into any clothing store and find something that fit. I hadn't been in those stores for over 15 years. Heck, I couldn't even walk from the parking lot to the mall without pain!! I didn't realize how much being super-morbidly obese had stolen from me.
So, say goodbye to your favorite foods. Don't gorge...be present and taste them...savor them...and tuck them away in your memory. Then look to your future with the knowledge that you are going to survive obesity. You are going to beat this thing and get your life back!!
Rawr!!!! :)
I can tell you from the other side that it is TOTALLY WORTH IT!!!
Dive in...Dive Deep!!
And I want to see your before/after pics a year from now!!
JJ
I have things as prepared as I possibly can at this point without tipping too far into crazy land. I have been on and off the wagon this past few days trying to stay distracted enough to avoid the fast food drive thru lanes and all that other junk. I attended a local lavender festival this past weekend and it was absolutely gorgeous weather and the music, vendors, artisans and the fields of lavender and farms kept me deliriously distracted. I smiled when I realized that this was the first time in forever that I attended an event and food wasn't my first priority. I didn't even get crazy with all the wonderful available foods. I did indulge in some lemon-lavender sorbet and had only one serving- this is new behavior for me. I guess that the mourning period for my worst/favorite food groups is easier for now. I'm feeling good with the commitment to change and having surgery. Today I am not sabotaging myself. Nothing tastes or feels as good as success.
JJ