hi Blue - Others can notice your new body, but only you can FEEL what your new body means. I think that although my clothes fit differently, I didn't sense a real difference until I noticed that I felt better and I could do things I would never have done before. Silly stuff - that aint so silly for folks like us - I could fit in a booth in a restaurant comfortably; I could stand for longer periods without getting whiny; I now find myself crossing my legs all the time when I couldn't even do it before; I actually like going to the gym for the appointments with my trainer; I like the idea of getting outdoors to walk. NONE of these things were the B.S. (before surgery) me. They are all the after surgery me - and THAT is how I notice the difference.

CONGRATS on your 75 lb loss ! ! That is an accomplishment you should be very proud of ! ! !

are you serious 75lbs that's 34kgs, that's so impressive.
what surgery did you have???

Thank you momo, I will try to pay more attention to those accomplishments!

Ratsack, I had the sleeve procedure.

I am pre surgery now, but have already lost almost 30 lbs. I can see the changes in my body when I look in the mirror, but I do the same thing that you do. I'll say to myself: "Well yea my waist looks smaller and I can see my collar bones, but my hips are still huge and my arms are flabby." I think that along with the weight loss we have to heal our minds. We are never going to be " perfect" no one is. And today's standard of beauty is ridiculous. Be proud of your progress! There are always going to be things that you want to change about yourself. Instead of harboring on the negative "Oh this needs improvement" side of things try thinking this way. How do you feel? I would imagine a lot better than you did pre-surgery. Celebrate the fact that you have made a big life change to improve yourself and your health! That takes a lot of strength and commitment! And congratulations on your weight loss so far! You are doing great!

Congratulations on being 75 lighter! What a load off!

At my first live introduction support group I sat next to a woman who showed me her pictures of her progress. She had taken a picture every month in the same position to show her progress. She said it really helped her to see herself realistically in her new body. I did the same thing and it made all the difference in how I saw myself. I would add each months picture to a Word document and keep it on my bathroom mirror. I loved seeing the new me emerge and the pictures helped to make it real for me.

Pictures and body measurements can help you begin to grasp the changes that you are making. But don't worry about the delay between your body change and your head changes. It typically takes all of us a while to begin to think about ourselves differently.

I'll be five years PO in November, and still, I can have a day when I "feel fat" even though I am not. If I go shopping on days when my head is in the past, I buy things that are too big. It's weird. It just takes a long time to get past that old mental picture.

I'm 4 months out. I've dropped several pants sizes and my new pants look tiny to me. Almost every day when I go to put on a pair of pants I think "Oh no! These are too small! They'll never fit!" and then I put them on and they fit. It's weird and funny :-)

It takes a long time for our heads to catch up to our bodies. I still hug the walls of a wide hallway to "make room" for others coming my way. When I was heavier, it was a courtesy to give them room, now they think I don't like being near them! They imagine I'm snooty. LOL

I agree with MNMama. i lost 175 pounds in a few short months. I am fine with me. Those that haven't been able to be supportive and keep up are distant memories.

This one woman told me to lift weight and look in the mirror it will help you start to realize the changes.
try that and see if works.

Congrats on shedding 75 lbs!! You are right, it can take quite a while for our heads to catch up with the new realities of our bodies. At 5 1/2 years out, I'm maintaining and I can still catch myself in negative self-talk.

For as far back as I can remember I thought I needed to lose weight. Even in high school when I weighed 125 lbs, I wanted to lose 25 lbs -because the chart said someone 5 ft tall should weigh 100 lbs. and I dieted myself to obesity. So, when I started this journey toward health (weighing over 300 lbs), I promised myself that if I ever got down to a reasonable weight (I was thinking anything under 160 would be great), I would just be thankful and not beat myself up anymore. It hasn't always been easy to keep that promise, but when I take time to remember what life was like when I weighed 250-300+ lbs, I can't be anything but grateful. No more c-pap, GERD, pitting edema, burning shins when I walk, embarrassment, inability to fit in certain chairs, charting my course through a crowded room to make sure the path was wide enough for me, not being able to cross my legs or arms, etc, etc, etc. Honestly, no matter what I look like, I can move through life so much more easily at a healthy weight than when I weighed more than my refrigerator!

With all that said, I remember struggling with my body image on the way down the scale. Honestly, shopping for clothes helped (even when I didn't buy anything). Like InVirginia, I remember looking at clothes and thinking "there is no way I can fit into that!" and being completely wrong! Another thing that helped was the excel spreadsheet I used to track my weight loss. In addition to the usual stuff, I kept a running tally of % of excess weight gone and I set up part of the spreadsheet to show every pound I wanted to shed (one cell per lb) and I changed the color of the cell when I lost that pound. Seeing the lbs visually represented helped make the shrinking process feel more "real." Some people have used marbles for the same purpose: each marble represents a lb. Start with a container labeled "extra lbs" (or whatever) and fill it with marbles representing the number of excess lbs. Then, as the scale changes, move the marbles to the "gone" container.

Ultimately, this isn't really about the scale. It is about becoming the healthiest version of you - Of learning to love and nurture yourself rather than criticizing and punishing.

At the end of the day, doing the "headwork" is actually more difficult and takes longer than shedding the lbs. Totally worth it, though!!

JJ

Perhaps because it has happened so quickly. I lost 80 pounds before surgery so I was able to see the changes gradually through out the year. I am four weeks out from RNY and have only lost 17, which I was disappointed about. But I am learning to accept my body...flabs and all. Maybe your head just needs a little time to catch up with your body changes. Wishing you the best!

Thank you all! The support, suggestions and stories help me know I'm not alone in all these different feelings. Love hearing from all of you as I work through this journey!

I have lost 30pounds since surgery 9-17-15. my pants fit different, my shirts fit different. I totally understand but I know more changes are coming and trying to except them with open arms.