Most of the time once I'm done at work I go back home through subway and bus. Through the subway path that I must take all the time there's that station near a casino. I know I'm always one step away to commit a mistake because I know myself and If I put the feet out of the metro at the station, there's no way I'm going back inside without a short trip to casino by the bus connect the casino (5 minutes).

What I hate about gambling is that there is no forgiveness to a mistake unless you believe in God or someone with a higher power. That's probably why I don't plan on going to these meeting. I have the sad impression about the people who attends to these meetings that gave themselves away to God and that they only accept their addictions and the way they are made, partially or fully, through God's faith. I don't believe in God and maybe that's wrong of me- however I will still do my best to fight the impulsion of gambling and to self-control myself the best I can.

The loss is always huge on every relapse, you'll feel bad after regardless the winning or the losing you'll always be losing partially somewhere - it's either a financial lost, a personal lost or both. You know you don't want to start this countdown of days without gambling any money, do you?