I understand your frustration. The worst part for me was the ride home, the endless self hatred. I am still not free of this addiction and it has been 17 years, I quit and then go back, like a dance. But I haven't given up yet. Please don't be so hard on yourself and please don't hurt yourself, the pain will not end with you, my husband committed suicide 10 years ago due to his own addictions and my 2 children and I have suffered ever since. There is help, here, GA, counselling, self banning. You have options even though at times it doesn't seem like it. People care, especially the ones who share your pain with this addiciton.

Don t beat yourself up. It will only lead to more gambling and depression. I m thinking I may have to stop my Internet access to avoid the urges. Maybe for the short term anyways.

I did the same thing yesterday....I lost 1100 and I know that I need help so this week I will go back to my GA meetings because if I would follow their advices and program I COULD avoid this bitter casino trip...belive me GA progam really works if we are willing to stop this destructive behavior. GOD BLESS YOU

hello last bet05... i feel your pain 05-10-12 and 05-11-12 has been sooooo hard i was clean for almost 2wks and this urge came over me soooo strong it was soooo hard to fight , then i got on dailystrenth and start reading post and getting my children situated for school. and end up not going and i thank god for that bcuz i was determined, i woke up the nxt day with the same urge and end up takn a few doll. to the casino and lost it all, now i am broke for mothers day. its a new day and will dust myself off and try at again. and take it one minute at a time. god plzzz help us all.

Hi lastbet - I understand what you're going through. I've bet on the horses at the track and online. It's too tempting to have access right on the computer. I even received a special card that would let me into certain horse tracks and services b/c I gambled so much on the horses. I was so disgusted, I shredded the card. Every once in awhile, I wish I could look at it again. Well, not me, the addiction.

I try to remember that I'm not depriving myself if I don't gamble. I'm breaking an addiction. The common thoughts that run through my head are "I deserve to do what I want, when I want." & "I'm special, I can win a great deal of money and pay on my bills if I really concentrate." But, I realize they are lies. I was being a slave to gambling and the more I played, the further in debt I went. So rationalizing what's going on in my head really helps.

Be good to yourself. Sit down at the table with a cup of coffee and look at your financial situation. Come up with a plan. You can get through this.

HI and I know what you're going through. I've been gambling on and off for 15 years. Everytime I think I've got it beat, it enters back into my world..I moved to Boston from Miami where there were a lot of casinos. There are none in MA but today I drove down to RI for the 5th time in 7 months and lost 2300.00. I'm just crushed. No idea how to recover from this lose. As I was sitting in the casino with my cards maxed out and my check account upside down 1200.00. Security walked past me. I asked if I can ban myself. He said yes. He took me to the back area, took my pix, I signed some forms and we agreed if I came back I would be arrested. I'm hoping the fear of being arrested will be enough to keep me from Gambling again.

We all lose touch of reality and it happens so easily. Don't beat yourself up over it.... learn from it and move forward. I'm not saying its easier but sometimes you just need to hear the facts as hard as it may be!!