I did read your link and I agree with the premise that people are dislocated and that does create internal strife. It used to be that families lived together, or just down the road. They had a support system in place that was unwavering. So many of us are so dislocated from our families, with an email here or there, a phone call once in a while, etc. Not the same at all.

I think the the book - "In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts" would be an interesting read. I read the transcript from the interview with the author and once again we see that many of the addicts he comes in contact with were abused or neglected when they were younger. He also suggests that stress will keep the addict in their addiction. He mentions that he believes parental stress when the person is a baby or a child can be correlated with ADD. Possibly he mentions this with addictions as well? I can see where parental stress can be felt by a developing person as the parent being emotionally unavailable, therefore causing all kinds of disconnects for a child. We then carry all of this into adulthood.

Luckily, with alot of work, we can do something about that as adults. I do see where the stress can hamper progress being made though. That stress comes from many different directions.

Thanks for bringing these to our attention Sabine!

I agree,
the minute I feel stress, which can come from all kinds of
directions, I want to revert to the addiction and avoid the
feeling.
Just think how hard it would be to have gambling strive
if our world was not filled with the stressors such as it
is today.

I have read of Gabor Mate and heard good things,
it is just hard for me to reach the agreement of
the spirituality concepts since I wasn't practicing
my religion as much in the last years and I am
still researching where I am at in the belief of
my Higher Power.

Thank you for posting some thoughtful and
thought provoking and information inclusive
ideas.
This ALL helps with my recovery and I appreicate it.

happy gamble free day

Being dislocated really resonated with me. I grew up in a neighborhood and left there to live close to my husbands family on their land in BC. We worked for years on the land with the vision in mind that the four boys,their wives and children would live and grow old there, taking care of their mom. The family fell apart and we moved again to the United States. In many ways it was a good move as after nine years we are free, have a lovely home and good jobs and the family feud continues- what a bullet we dodged. My own family is close- my mom is Scottish and Irish and I grew up surrounded by aunts, uncles and lots of family gatherings.
My father is Italian and long gone but every fibre of my being is a big family person, community sharing food and caring for one another and we have created a small family/extended family of our own but have really lost that in our own families, grieving it still. I think it is a big piece in my loneliness and sense of isolation. I have friends but was grown and raised that family is your best friends. It's very hard and painful- those losses. I am reading In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts now and will let you know how it is.
Xox

dearest strangeseraphim,

I too grieve for the long lost family life of yesterday.
that is why I posted here about the need for us
to grasp this site with all of our mind and soul
and make it a "safe" place for ALL to come and
be with each other as we can so understand and
empathize with each other through our common
need of these qualities that lack in most of our
everyday lives.

I started reading the book and found that I could
relate to Gabor Mate and his suppositions that
early childhood "neglect" (this can mean a lot of
different things to a lot of different people) can cause
us, along with the fast paced and unconnectedness of our society
today, make us tend toward addictions in its many forms.

That is why this site is so important to me and to be able
to feel free to come here and post and BE understood and
welcomed and feel connected to society in a most
compassionate way.

Thank you for seeking to understand and for
sharing all that you learn and helping us all along the way.

It's certainly a pleasure.
I appreciate you as well.
:)