Hi and welcome. I'm not much on giving advice as I am fighting my own CG demons.

If you have to distance yourself from your family to battle your addiction, then so be it. You are going to have to do what you have to do for you. In a perfect world, you could all go to GA together. But we know this not a perfect world.

Maybe you can sit down with your family and explain to them that you have a gambling problem that you plan on facing head on. Maybe you will strike a nerve with someone or it not, at least you will have put it out there and they will know your limits.

Good luck.

Hi. Thanks so much for your reply. I wish I could say something, but unfortunately my family is EXTREMELY critical and in total denial. I have never told them why I won't go with them. I just chose to stay away because it hit me that they are the reason I started gambling in the first place. They would do nothing but criticize, even though they are guilty but in denial themselves. My parents took me for my 21st birthday. I won about $100 that night and couldn't believe how easy it was. I was a very hard working person and was always watching it and paying bills on time. That ended after that night. It has been years since then, and although I have have had short periods away from gambling, it somehow creeps into my life and destroys me even more. I have a family of my own, and I have a wonderful husband, but unfortunately, he has this weakness too, and we talk each other into gambling. He's not nearly as bad as me, but he'll go if I talk him into it. We have both decided to never go to the casinos again, and as of now, it has been almost a month. We are really seeing negative repurcussions now and it has us really depressed, but also really motivated to make our lives better and turned around before we destroy ourselves.

There's that adage - "misery loves company". Sometimes family wants us to play a certain part or role and if we don't, it's a no-no. You can make a dramatic change and show that recovery is possible despite the odds of everyone else slipping down the slope. It doesn't mean you have to make them stop gambling as well or point your finger at them. You understand that you have a choice and you are willing to come out of denial and forge a plan.

Remember that this addiction didn't happen over night even though it seems like you were convinced pretty early on. It will take time to get to where you want to be. The effort to try and do so is what counts. Maybe there is an interesting hobby you'd like to pursue. Maybe there are other ways to connect to your family in the meantime. Just do not fall for the guilt or displaced anger they may lay on you. They may not want you to get better, strange as it might seem (just family dynamics stuff).

Put yourself first. Enjoy the small things in life. Keep your boundaries up and do not take what is being said to you too personally. Go antiquing or explore a small town, go for coffee somewhere you've never been. My big escape is the movie theater. $10 bucks for 2 hrs. of entertainment versus I don't know how much if I was gambling for 2 hrs. straight. Remind yourself that it won't be easy so treat yourself well and be your own friend. We are here to support you as well. Take care! :-)

Thank you all for your support. It is so nice to see that I am not the only one feeling the way I feel. I can relate to so many of your posts about your feelings and thoughts about gambling. I have so much guilt built up for what I have done. I feel like I have taken so much from my children especially, and they are the best kids in the world and deserve so much more. They are taken care of, but there are things they have begun missing out on because I don't have the money to pay for it because I try to gamble the little I have extra to get us out of debt that we never would be in to begin with if I never gambled. I just want soooooo badly to heal from this and get on with my life. I have sooo much to live for...have been so blessed with my beautiful family and I don't want any more regrets!! Life goes by so fast and I want to enjoy every minute of it! Thank you all so much for supporting me. This is my first step toward healing, and so far all of your stories have made me feel like maybe I shouldn't hate myself as much as I do. Instead, I should be putting all my energy in making my life better.

Hello Prayingfo...

Welcome to DS and this forum-you will find tremendous comfort in knowing you are not alone. There is a common thread that runs through a great majority of us who use this site -we are compulsive gamblers and are standing right beside you.

I felt completely lost and ashamed admitting my gambling was getting out of control, but I knew if I didn't do something about it, my life would be in ruins. Your love for your children and family is evident through your posts. Feel good about yourself and for taking the necessary steps to put an end to the rat race of chasing your losses. If your other family members think you're silly for not wanting to go with them, so be it. You'll have peace of mind with that decision and that's what matters most right now...you and your children!

I hope we see you often ... we're here to support and encourage you.

Take care, Tagg20