Gambling Addiction & Recovery Support Group

Compulsive gambling is an urge or addiction to gamble despite harmful negative consequences or a desire to stop. A preferred term among many professionals is problem gambling, as few people described by the term experience true compulsions in the clinical sense of the word. Problem gambling often is defined by whether harm is experienced by the gambler or others rather...

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Life time ban

Leapyear22
Leapyear22
A week ago today, I drove to the casino and stayed out for two days. Day 5 in recovery, today I went with my daughter and self excluded from the two casinos that I would go to, and closest ones to me, I did a life time ban. It was interesting, the lady behind the counter at one of the two said to me "so, you don't want to come and visit us anymore" she actually tried to talk me out of it. Both security officers in both casinos were very nice, although I was escorted out and told that if I come back, I would be arrested, the security officers were very nice and treated me with respect,

So, there you have it, I am building my road blocks and arming myself from another relapse, its not easy, getting through this last week its been very hard, emotionally and financially, I did a ton of damage this time around.

I can't sleep well, I am still beating myself up a bit, not as bad as I was a few days ago, but I am definitely upset with myself, I think about the moment I drove in the direction of the casino, and why I didn't stop myself, its odd, because I didn't have the overwhelming urge, that I would have had prior, I just went. It scares me, I'm afraid, this addiction is scary. I don't scare easily, but I can honestly tell you, I am afraid of this addiction,

Do the night, I will be home with my pups, and watching TV and trying to sleep.

xoxoxox
itsjustmeagain
itsjustmeagain
hey leap, i worked around the house today, packing, cleaning, throwing away things, making a pile for goodwill, same stuff i have been doing since the house was sold, i felt good, i felt like i knew money was going to come in and it was ok to go, something made me look at my checking account, i think it was too see if my ez pass was paid, so i didnt get stuck on the way to casino, well the balance WAS NOT what i expected, my money goes in and out so fast, my bills are on auto pay, so i got scared, started budgeting, scared the sh&t out of myself, and i didnt go, i even tried to say go with 80 bucks, just go get the comp....i didnt, i layed down fell asleep, woke up felt hungry, ate, then went back to the cleaning, did alot of good this night, weekend, is going nicely now, truth be told, im scared too, scared that i will go and go and ruin all the clean slate, so sad we dont have faith or trust in ourselves, im hoping the distance, since my move is an additional 45 min away on top of the 35 it takes to get to the casino, thats all my SOLID plan is so far, pathetic, but it may reduce my urges and damage, but i stil have vegas on the 25th....so not good...but god be with me, higher power is the only one holding my cards (pardon the pun) get some sleep or chat if you want...night!!
Leapyear22
Leapyear22
Hi itsjustme... sometimes, keeping ourselves busy is the best we can do, and no, its not pathetic, your plan is solid and the fact that you are doing things to help you block the possibilities is a good thing. I can speak for myself when I say, this addiction can get me, when I'm not even looking. Be careful with the money you are getting for the sale of your house, maybe have someone take over you finances? I know for me, I have had to ask for help this time, someone went with me to sign out of the casinos, and they will also be here to help me hold onto my finances, once I finally get caught up. So proud of you, please keep going.
stopat56
stopat56
good for you leapy for the lifetime ban! and itsjustme, you're holding on.

that is all any of us can do: put up roadblocks, stay away, and hold on one day at a time. I struggled so bad today, I'm ashamed of myself. so far so good, but I think I"ll just go to bed, and try, try, try again tomorrow.
darlingd
darlingd
Big big congratulations on self excluding. Doing that has REALLY helped me. 'My' casino is only about 35 minutes from my house and way too easy to get to. I'm glad everyone was respectful to you. I had a similar experience when I did it. It was a little strange when they escorted me to my car, but I knew that's what they were going to do so I was prepared.
Very best wishes to you. SO HAPPY for you. In my opinion, self banning is HUGE. Enjoy the day. Love
Charmed2014
Charmed2014
They escorted me up to the parking lot too. They left when we left the parking area. I think it is their protocol to escort us up to the car.

What was heartwarming for me was when the officer told me, that he was happy of my decision. One soul is saved. He said, he is just doing his job but it is so sad so many people destroy their lives because of gambling.

I know, they are just part of the system. But I know, they have a heart :)
Cherbear2012
Cherbear2012
I want to do it but... I'm so scared to even go there again. I know so many people that go there because I live in such a rural area. I wish I didn't have to go there to do it. I'm really thinking about it though. I don't want to fall victim to my own demons. I do think there is always a chance I could lose my mind and go back. Is there any reason I shouldn't do this? Do most successful people do it? Are there some here with long term recovery who haven't banned? Are there any good reasons not to do it? I'm torn and I'm not sure why but relapse scares the hell out of me. :(
losergal
losergal
You did the right thing and I was just like you, are you sure we aren't related, lol ??? It is a relief to know I have that lifetime ban and I am saving money to go on a cruise this winter. It will cost what I blew in a couple months at casino and I love the food and booked a room with a balcony so it will be deluxe and I deserve it!
I am flying from Miami and to Miami 7 days.
Treat yourself well!
KatfromCali
KatfromCali
Good job Leap. I'm so happy you're hanging in there. I was worried about you.
rosy29
rosy29
Hang in there, Leap. As I've said, my monkey wasn't the B&M casinos, but the online ones.

When I self-excluded, all were very nice and immediately set the ban in place. Then I told my SO what I had done so that he would be my block too.

If I hadn't been feeling lousy all week, I would be feeling pretty dang good. LOL! You can do it!