Gamble free, I have lost track of the days, I actually decided not to count my days, and take each day at a time, so I say, today, this moment, I didn't place a bet. I was thinking on my way home tonight, sitting in the rain, that I haven't even thought about gambling, which is strange for me. I think life time banning myself from my local stomping grounds definitely helped. I actually think it saved my life. It was one tool I hadn't tried during my years of trying, and my only regret is I hadn't done it sooner. Life is good today, financially, I am struggling which is strange for me, because in years past, I was making great money, but not now, its slow. Maybe its supposed to be like that? Humbles me for sure. But, as I sit and write this, and listen to the rain, I realized, that all the worry in the world won't change things, prior to posting this, I paid my bills, and although I paid them, I'm broke. But, when I was in my addiction, paying bills was not on my mind, I actually thought, I would go and win more with my money and be able to pay my bills, help my sister, and oh yeah, buy that super expensive bag for my daughter! THAT DIDN"T HAPPEN, I may have won a few times, that's what kept me going back, but, the wins were far less frequent than the loses. We all know that, those of us who suffer from compulsive gambling, we know that.

It took me many years to get where I am today, and although I have many regrets, I forgive myself, I'm a better person today than I have been in a very long time. So, yeap, I'm broke, and this Christmas will be slim, to known, but this Christmas, my family has me back, that in itself is pretty amazing. So much to celebrate this holiday season.

Keep it simple, as they say, keep it simple.

Hugs