Hi Flyorra. I have been so depressed lately too. I had my Dr increase my anti depressants yesterday. We'll see if that helps. I hope you don't give in to this demon. Its totally not worth it and you'll just feel worse afterwards. If you're like me, you'll feel better for a short while, but in the end you'll just feel worse. Stay strong!!! I am always here for you along with all the other friends here.
God bless you...hugs...Lisa

hi flyorra in having a bad day also. guess were gona have good and bad days in recovery as the bills pile up and i think of all the damage that i have done over the last year it really is sickening to think about . i keep asking myself how many times am i going to keep doin this to myself? luckily the thought of going back to the casino makes me want to vomit right now so i once again hope in my heart that i never go back. i hope ya feel better. im trying to occupy my mind today so i dont think about what has been done. we can only hope for a brighter future . best gamble free wishes to you and all of the ds family god bless

flyorra - i've felt what you are feeling right now and I made it through it. Do everything you can to not run away from it by gambling. You can make it through to the other side but I think you have to walk through the fire to get there.

A little while back there was a post about the grieving process and talking about where you were at and had been. I believe we do grieve for a lot of things while in recovery.... for what we've done, for the loss of the "fun" we had, for what we've lost, for who we have become. I've discovered that I move around in all of the different stages but I've struggled with depression the most. Love yourself enough to allow these feelings but try everything you can to keep moving forward (even if it is only in some small way like getting dressed, eating a healthy meal, meditating or praying). And get some help if you think you can't pull yourself out of it.

The 5 stages of loss and grief:

1. Denial and Isolation
2. Anger
3. Bargaining
4. Depression
5. Acceptance

If you want to read more about this:

http://psychcentral.com/lib/2006/the-5-stages-of-loss-and-grief/

Hello Flyorra, I have been in a depression myself. Very uncharacteristic of me. Everything is a drag. Nothing seems good.
FL, here is the thing I know, and I say it to myself when I want to go (which this week has been every freakin' day) -nothing is so bad, that gambling won't make it worse. -I have to tell myself this, because then I know what a hypocrite I am.
Sure, we can go, zone out and not feel anything for however long we are there. But then it will be two fold. Because not only will we feel that sucky way we felt when we went there. We will also be down on ourselves for "doing it again". You said you are sad for no reason.Makes me think of the Carpenters song:
Talkin' to myself and feelin' old
Sometimes I'd like to quit
Nothing ever seems to fit
Hangin' around
Nothing to do but frown
Rainy Days and Mondays always get me down.

What I've got they used to call the blues
Nothin' is really wrong
Feelin' like I don't belong
Walkin' around
Some kind of lonely clown
Rainy Days and Mondays always get me down.
My favorite saying is "This too shall Pass" and so it shall. It is just damn hard to wait to feel better.
Tell you what -you don't go today, and I won't go today. Okay?
Love ya, E