Gambling Addiction & Recovery Support Group
Compulsive gambling is an urge or addiction to gamble despite harmful negative consequences or a desire to stop. A preferred term among many professionals is problem gambling, as few people described by the term experience true compulsions in the clinical sense of the word. Problem gambling often is defined by whether harm is experienced by the gambler or others rather...
Hi,
I have been struggling with gambling for a few years now. It got worse after my Dad died four years ago. He was a gambler himself and when I go to the casino I feel comfort in remember him. However, I am not having so much fun anymore. I can't afford my gambling anymore and I am putting so much pressure on my husband and feel so much remorse after I leave losing money.
I'm admitting I have a problem and would like to say hello to anyone who is going through the same things. I'm open for ideas on how to start a new life without gambling.
Thank you!
I have been struggling with gambling for a few years now. It got worse after my Dad died four years ago. He was a gambler himself and when I go to the casino I feel comfort in remember him. However, I am not having so much fun anymore. I can't afford my gambling anymore and I am putting so much pressure on my husband and feel so much remorse after I leave losing money.
I'm admitting I have a problem and would like to say hello to anyone who is going through the same things. I'm open for ideas on how to start a new life without gambling.
Thank you!
I would recommend find ing a Gamblers anonymous meeting close to where you live.
One of the posts on this site if you scroll back a couple of weeks was entitled help lines and it has numbers that you will find helpful.
Also stick close to this site. You will get a lot of support.
But we take life a day at a time so youtr goal for today is not to gamble. Tomorrow will be addressed when we get to it.
Well done on your decision
The thing that helped me the most was reaching out for help instead of keeping so many secrets and hiding my addiction. I started telling the truth with a therapist that specialized in addiction and that got the ball rolling.
My gambling began when my aunt died and my mom no longer had anyone to go to the casino with. It all starts so innocently. You are in good company with people who understand and are supporting one another through the struggle.
I hope you will stick close and share, reach out whenever you need.
:)
We're all here working our recovering from gambling addiction, whether it's ourselves or someone in our lives we care about. I am a recovering gambling addict too...you are not alone.
I agree with the great advice already given. A few things I would add:
1. start a journal if you haven't already. I also wrote a letter to myself, describing how I felt after a big loss at the casino. Put exactly how you will feel afterwards. I carry the letter in my purse & if I'm out & about doing errands & get the urge, I force myself to read the letter BEFORE I decide to go.
2. utilize your local library--I've read a lot of books on addiction & psychology...it really helps shed new light on addiction and might help you think of things you haven't thought of before.
3. limit your access to cash...can you have your husband pay the bills, hold the ATM/credit cards until you feel more secure in your quit? You can't gamble if you don't have money
4. you can't gamble if you don't have the time. Keep busy. Rediscover your hobbies.
5. pray. The last few times I gambled and hit rock bottom, I broke down & cried (I rarely cry), and I begged God to help give me the strength to overcome this addiction. Prayer makes you feel better especially when you start to feel overwhelmed.
6. self ban yourself from the casino(s) you go to
7. are there other things you father was interested other than gambling that would let you feel close to him again? Maybe go talk to him at the cemetery every time you get the urge?
Gather as many tools as you can and start trying them. I like to think of my recovery as a muscle--the more I practice the stronger I get. It takes work but it is SO worth it.
And, finally, when you get the almost irresistible urge to go gamble, know that that urge is not a command...you DO have a choice. Please choose to work your recovery. I am so much happier being gamble free and you could be too :o)
(((BIG HUG)))
Cathy
post #5 and 6..........
use the tools you find here and elsewhere,
do the GA meetings,
and please read read here because this place is full of "tools".
I would also suggest that you make up new activities to replace the old and bad behavior. It got me when I didn't replace the time I spent in casinos with something new and rewarding because I just fell back into that old unconcious pattern.
This is the start
make some plans and carry them out.
if it don't work then make some adjustments.
It can be done and right here there is proof everyday.
Be "seeing" you.
I had two turns on the downward spiral, the first was when both my parents died- just graduated college and didn't know how to replace them or anything else, frankly. Sadly, twenty some years after trying to put that behind me, I had stopped in on my Dad's passing anniversary to a place with horse betting to have a little toast so to speak (he had a couple horses and liked that, I didn't)... anyway, it came back and came back with a vengeance.
Admitting you have a problem is the first step- glad to hear you've taken it. Hanging tough through the first few weeks, in particular, is crucial, but it does get easier and your life will absolutely get better without gambling.
All the best,
Jay
the first few weeks are tough but very crutial.
Then it is like you start to remember a life before gambling,
the little glimpses of what a good life and good choices can bring you.
The hope start to spring up.
The daylight seems real and brighter.
The future starts to hold promise.
and recovery seems possible.
wait for it to happen,
it does.