If gambling leads to shoplifting you know what you have to do, right? Quit sabotaging yourself. I know it’s uncomfortable saying no to any addiction, uncomfortable meaning it’s not going to feel good. But it’s a necessary step to living a more honest life.
Dig deep in mind to find ways to deal with life that won’t end up hurting you.
You know what you need to do. Now do it.

Asking for help is difficult, and it's a step in the right direction. But the road after that first step is a long one, and I have to work on it bit by bit every day. In reading through various threads on this forum, I sometimes think we post in the hopes that someone will magically reveal the secret to a cure, or tell us (lie to us) it's really ok to gamble/shoplift/whatever just so we can instantly feel better without doing the work. Anything to avoid having to look at ourselves, take responsibility for what we've done, and make it right. One thing I've learned is that wishful thinking doesn't make it so. All I know is that today I have a choice, and today I will not gamble.

Thank you for replies. I dont expect solutions just envoutagement.

Encouragement

The only encouragement I can offer is shoplifting is wrong and is a nice name for stealing.

True skip but its an addiction nonetheless

Flash, Stealing/shoplifting is wrong, but I’m beginning to understand where you’re coming from when you say for you it’s an addiction. Like any addiction the only hope is to abstain from participating in it. To stop. To quit. That’s why so many of us here write today I will not gamble. Abstaining from any addiction begins with day one, today I will not gamble, or in your case shoplift, and proceeds with day two,the same thing, a declaration of again, today, I will not feed my addiction.
It’s true that once in recovery it’s hard to explain in words why it’s a place I want to be way, way more, than when I gambled, fed my addiction. I want today, free and easy.
Dig deep and find yourself, your inner friend. Want this.

I think you need to work at and EXPECT a solution. Starting with getting help to get quit if you are not making headway on it all alone. What are you doing to get quit? You talk about your relapses but not about a new plan of action - if you don't change anything nothing changes. You just play the same tune over and over forever!
Time for action! What have you tried? Perhaps self-banning from your favorite stores to shoplift at - or vowing to take a shopping buddy when you go shopping as a deterrent to shoplifting. Or not going in stores at all - hire someone to do your shopping. Tell us what you are doing different this week.

Qwit, spot on advice.

The only real plan i have is to avoid shops and deal with my emotions

If it is not working, in that you are still shoplifting & gambling you need to add something to it. Maybe you need to fully commit and do all you can do in order to get back to enjoying life and feeling you deserve something more than misery.

I think i have to commit now. I have tried ounselling. I have tried a phyciatrist. Neither has been that effective. The most effective thing is a book im reading by dr peele. Im going to work with that. Im obviously not good at listening to others. Time to really listen to myself. No idea if what i wrote made sense !

When you listen to yourself, ask yourself the question: Why? Why am I self destructing? Who am I trying to hurt to right the wrongs that have been done to me. Be gentle with yourself, because no matter how much bad stuff you do, you are the only one sitting with this pain. Love yourself unconditionally. Close your eyes, forgive yourself and others that have hurt you so badly. You are loved and I am sure you will find peace again before the gambling even started. The only way to stop is one day at a time. Take care