One day at a time. One thing at a time.For TODAY I will not gamble.

After I spent my last dollar 2 days after payday (once a month) I realized I had nothing left to buy gas, food, etc. for the next month. Ashamed, I had to ask my father for money. He loaned me $200 to last until I got paid. It sure was a weird feeling not being able to buy things I wanted, but rather hold onto the money for things I needed. That gave me more respect for money.

The next paycheck was easier to hold onto since I didn't want to make that mistake again. I did. I would blow $500 the first week and at least 2 more times toward the end of the month. So for 6 months, I was giving 1/2 my paycheck to the casino. This was still unacceptable to me.

The day I self excluded, I went online and transferred my 2 maxed out credit cards at 24% to a 0% card. That was the biggest stress relieving step I took. I had to get serious. That was 132 days ago and now I have a downpayment for a house, my credit card debt is going down fast, and I don't have anymore bad feelings about blowing all my money.

It does get better if you work at it. Sunnie

Eastwester you are right - my words do sound like an addict looking for an excuse to gamble again but merely because I am afraid to embark on this journey. However, I know I must in order to save my life and I WILL do it. I definitely know I am tired of being sick and tired. It's funny, I often try to remember what my life was like before I started gambling. I try to reflect back on it but it is so hard to remember what I used to do for fun and entertainment. Bits and pieces come to mind and I know I can put it all back together with time. I truly thank each and every one of you for your words of encouragement and wisdom. I have not gambled since Friday and at this moment that feels pretty good.

I am right there with you as Friday was the last time I gambled as well. I keep telling myself that if I gamble even $20 it will cost me $40 - The $20 I lost and $20 more to put in my pocket for things I need. That is part of what put me over the edge and got me determined on this path is I hate the feeling of having absolutely NO CASH in my pocket. Yesterday I bought lunch for my daughter and I and a few items we needed with my $20 so most of it is gone. The good news and good feeling is that I still have something left. Had I taken my $20 to the casino I wouldn't have left until I was at $0 so I am feeling better about my financial situation already. Stay Strong we are all in this together.

For me, the financial situation started to improve immediately. That very first day of being gamble free, I wasn't out trying to borrow money to gamble with, wasn't selling or pawning anything to have money to gamble with, didn't take any new loans out that first day. As far as feeling like PROGRESS was being made, for me it came with that first paycheck after stopping gambling. With that I was able to see that it was possible to make my bills and still have money for food, gas and necessities when I was no longer holding back money for gambling. Since that time it's only gotten BETTER and BETTER. Loans now all paid off, my son paid back the money I owed him, credit cards paid and cut up, 2nd mortgage paid off. Yes, 5 1/2 months without gambling is like we are living like NEW people or at least we have our OLD life back before gambling drug us to the depths of HELL and back.

The best way for me to explain it is....that it took time to dig the hole, and will take time to dig out of the hole.

Try to think of it this way. At least now, the hole that you will be digging will be for a good reason, not for destruction.

Worry looks around, sorry looks back and faith looks up.

Keep looking up and keep your eye on the prize. The prize of being gamble free, debt free, and just plain FREE.

Be good to YOU!

It takes a lot of work, but is very worth it. If we all put into ourselves what we put into gambling, think of what a difference it would make in our lives and the lives of the people that we hold so dear to us. AMAZING GRACE!

xoxoxoxoxoxox
mamabear21

The stress of digging out of the hole is far, far better then the stress that gambling creates. The day you quit and are committed to quitting will be the best day of your life, until the next day, when you don't gamble again. Each day is better and each day becomes easier.

I will probably never dig out of the financial hole I created from gambling, but I have not gambled for 6 years tomorrow and I have never been happier.

Thanks for your reply mpit1111. I love it that you've never been happier - it makes me have hope! Congrats on six years of freedom!

When I was in the midst of gambling, I was very conscious of my increasing debt level but continued to gamble anyway. I kept telling myself I'd win money back to repay the debts. But this was virtually impossible.

It reminds me of the Simpsons episode where everyone is digging to get out of a hole, and Chief Wiggum says, "no no, dig UP stupid!". For me, this aptly described my situation. I was trying to dig UP, which was virtually impossible. Indeed, I was stupid.

To answer your question, your financial situation changes the moment you stop gambling. If you don't go to the casino today, you've saved yourself LOTS of money (and future time). For me, a big change came when I changed my credit cards, going from 21% interest to 0%, it was like I could breathe again. Now, I'm slowly paying it back, and if all goes according to plan, I'll go from red to black in 7 months (that's 7 months of my life wasted because I got involved in this stupid habit).

You sound like me! For me the financial situation was so bad before I even started gambling that I found myself saying, "who cares it is so bad anyway". But the thing that I didn't have before was the shame, fear, hopelessness and embarassment. Being a single mom I have had bad money problems, but I never want to feel again like I don't want to go on. Listening to my own words, maybe it is about the quality of our lives,and the focus needs to get off of the money. Peace to you.

I love eastwester comments.
He is right, why do we want to be victims and looosers..why not winners and champions of our lives. this is so inspirring. thanks eastwester for such encouraging words.