Gambling Addiction & Recovery Support Group
Compulsive gambling is an urge or addiction to gamble despite harmful negative consequences or a desire to stop. A preferred term among many professionals is problem gambling, as few people described by the term experience true compulsions in the clinical sense of the word. Problem gambling often is defined by whether harm is experienced by the gambler or others rather...
I found this post on here and it touched me to my core.I used to dream Id win big to be able to quit my job and spoil people close to me. I went to my first GA meeting and am searching for an English meeting (for here in Quebec French is the official language.
Today I joined a gym to help me stay healthy and support me to make healthier choices.
Here is the article on the Dreamworld of a Female Escape Compulsive Gambler
A LOT OF TIME IS SPENT IMAGINING HOW SHE WILL ESCAPE HER DESPERATION. SHE CREATES IMAGES OF THE HAPPINESS AND ABUNDANCE SHE WILL RECEIVE AS SOON AS SHE BEGINS GAMBLING, AND OF THE RELIEF SHE WILL FEEL WHEN SHE HAS BEEN RESCUED FROM HER
LIFE OF CHAOS, ABUSE, AND LOSS. SHE OFTEN SEES HERSELF AS AN UNAPPRECIATED CAREGIVER WHO IS TRAPPED AND ISOLATED, BUT WHO CAN BE TRANSPORTED OUT OF CIRCUMSTANCES IN THE GLITTER OF THE GAMBLING WORLD. WHEN SHE IMAGINES HERSELF GAMBLING, SHE IS CHARMED BY THE POSSIBILITY OF ESCAPE AND BY THE IMAGE OF HER MAKEOVER INTO THE PERSON SHE WISHES TO BE. PATHETICALLY, HOWEVER, THERE NEVER SEEMS TO BE ENOUGH TIME OR MONEY FOR GAMBLING. WHEN SHE SUCCEEDS, SHE CONTINUES GAMBLING IN AN EFFORT TO AVOID THE REALITY OF THE SUFFERING. ABOVE ALL, SHE SEEKS TO MAINTAIN THE ALTERED STATE PROVIDED BY HER DREAM WORLD. WHILE LOSING, SHE INVENTS ELABORATE SCHEMES TO PROLONG HER GAMBLING, THEREBY DELAYING HER RETURN TO REALITY. SADLY, SHE WILL PERSIST REPEATING THE CYCLE OF DESPERATION AND ESCAPE AND DENIAL. NO ONE CAN CONVINCE HER THAT HER DREAM WORLD IS DESTROYING HER. SHE CLINGS TO HER MYTHS, FOR WITHOUT THIS DREAM WORLD, LIFE WOULD NOT BE TOLERABLE.
Today I joined a gym to help me stay healthy and support me to make healthier choices.
Here is the article on the Dreamworld of a Female Escape Compulsive Gambler
A LOT OF TIME IS SPENT IMAGINING HOW SHE WILL ESCAPE HER DESPERATION. SHE CREATES IMAGES OF THE HAPPINESS AND ABUNDANCE SHE WILL RECEIVE AS SOON AS SHE BEGINS GAMBLING, AND OF THE RELIEF SHE WILL FEEL WHEN SHE HAS BEEN RESCUED FROM HER
LIFE OF CHAOS, ABUSE, AND LOSS. SHE OFTEN SEES HERSELF AS AN UNAPPRECIATED CAREGIVER WHO IS TRAPPED AND ISOLATED, BUT WHO CAN BE TRANSPORTED OUT OF CIRCUMSTANCES IN THE GLITTER OF THE GAMBLING WORLD. WHEN SHE IMAGINES HERSELF GAMBLING, SHE IS CHARMED BY THE POSSIBILITY OF ESCAPE AND BY THE IMAGE OF HER MAKEOVER INTO THE PERSON SHE WISHES TO BE. PATHETICALLY, HOWEVER, THERE NEVER SEEMS TO BE ENOUGH TIME OR MONEY FOR GAMBLING. WHEN SHE SUCCEEDS, SHE CONTINUES GAMBLING IN AN EFFORT TO AVOID THE REALITY OF THE SUFFERING. ABOVE ALL, SHE SEEKS TO MAINTAIN THE ALTERED STATE PROVIDED BY HER DREAM WORLD. WHILE LOSING, SHE INVENTS ELABORATE SCHEMES TO PROLONG HER GAMBLING, THEREBY DELAYING HER RETURN TO REALITY. SADLY, SHE WILL PERSIST REPEATING THE CYCLE OF DESPERATION AND ESCAPE AND DENIAL. NO ONE CAN CONVINCE HER THAT HER DREAM WORLD IS DESTROYING HER. SHE CLINGS TO HER MYTHS, FOR WITHOUT THIS DREAM WORLD, LIFE WOULD NOT BE TOLERABLE.
I clung in full denial to gambling until reality knocked me on my ass and spit in my face, then I could no longer deny that my life had become unmanageable.
Accepting that I could never be a social gambler again, that I had screwed up relationships and my life in some areas, beyond repair, and wanting something better for myself is what finally got me around the corner of denial.
Nine months of abstinence and hard internal work and work to rebuild some of what I lost, (including my self-worth), has made my life so much better. It has not made life easier, life is still sometimes harsh, painful and sorrowful but I now know that talking about those hardships and my feelings to at least one other person is a much quicker and lasting way to feeling whole again. The sweet bliss I experienced by gambling is like eating sugary food when I am hungry. It seems to fill me up at the moment, but ultimately, there is not enough sustenance in the sugary food to replace what I really need.
Thanks for sharing this thought provoking and heartfelt post, it definitely hit home.
I now have hope that I can find this joy again thanks to this site and support from each and every one here:)