Gambling Addiction & Recovery Support Group
Compulsive gambling is an urge or addiction to gamble despite harmful negative consequences or a desire to stop. A preferred term among many professionals is problem gambling, as few people described by the term experience true compulsions in the clinical sense of the word. Problem gambling often is defined by whether harm is experienced by the gambler or others rather...
Just an observation that I think might be kind of timely with some new folks joining the site this week.
It seems that a common theme for newer folks trying to take steps towards recovery is a fear of Gamblers Anonomous.
Being almost 4 months into recovery I can't say I'm anywhere close to a subjectmatter expert on this. I can only tell you that my personal experiences with GA have been incredibly positive. I attend meetings every Friday - I'd go more often but this is what works with my work/life schedule. There is no right or wrong answer to how many meetings you go to. You do what works for you in your road to recovery. My first few months in GA were pretty uneventful. I attended the meeting, told a story during the open therapy part of the meeting, did the serenity praryer, then left. As time passed I developed relationships with a few of the folks there. In fact, just this morning I hung around for about 10 minutes after the meeting and continued a conversation (based on this person's share during the meeting) and had just an incredible discussion. Not a discussion I could ever have with someone not going through the same thing I am.
If nothing else, I think GA helps you develop some relationships. As you go to more meetings you start to feel accountable, not just for yourself but for others. You're in that meeting to share and support with folks going through the same things you are. Your path to the meeting might be different, but your struggle is the same. Embrace the opportunity to begin the healing process, it's much easier with support. I would encourage everyone to embrace the sense of community GA offers.
It's a humbling experience, but so worth it.
Glad bc I need it and sad bc I really need it. Even after the meeting I did lay in bed and formulated a sneaky plan to sneak to a casino that’s about an hour away today (haven’t self excluded there and it’s in a different state, but I need to) while my bf is at work, and older kids will be at a school function all day. A sneaky day all planned that would only hurt me.... I literally had a great plan and then almost went through but had my bf take my car keys with him, so I’m here with this site and all of the information G.A. sent home with me. This sucks, but I’m really trying. I haven’t gambled since Monday and this is the first really strong urge I’ve had, so far. It will be an anxiety and white knuckle kind of day, but today I will not gamble.
I accomplished that goal while also attending a women only gambling treatment group the utilized many 12 step concepts. Sometimes people said things that bothered me, sometimes things were talked about that didn't apply to me. Sometimes people said wrong or mean things. (They are only people too. ) But Jason is right, having a (ready-made) support group of largely forgiving and supportive peers who have been in the same boat is invaluable. A wise mentor once told me to just find the gems I can take away from the meetings and leave the rest behind.
So, 3 plus years later I go occasionally to GA but I now have regained a groups of supportive friends that I had alienated myself from while in the throes of addiction. Secondly, largely because of treatment and GA, I practice a lifestyle daily, that has me continuing to strive to balance taking inventory, being grateful, doing something for someone else, doing the next right thing for myself, making sure to laugh, and learn while performing meticulous self-care.
rb18: Good job giving up the keys! Try treating yourself to bubble bath, an aromatic candle or doing something creative (even coloring) to take the edge off of the anxiety.
nb18 - thanks for taking the time to read this. That in itself makes me feel good and that my time is well spent posting on this site (sometimes the silence can be deafening). I echo your sentiments in being sad and glad to attend GA. I have and had those same exact emotions. Sure, I'm 100% happy to finally be facing my problem. I'm sad that I let it get to this point. The ol "if only I had..." thoughts start creeping in. Sometimes it's hard to silence them. But, they are counterproductive. I can't change past behavior but I surely can change my future actions. More importantly, I WANT to change them. Joycatcher is one of my favorite contributors here and early in my recovery I ready a quote of theirs saying "play the tape." When you're putting that sneak plan together "play the tape" start to finish and save nothing in between. By the time you get to the end you'll realize how foolish, unfulfilled, and empty you feel at the end result. For me, the first time I did this was about a month into recovery - I got as far as the result, so I win and I....so I lose and I....at that point I actually laughed out loud at how silly the plan was and just went back to my day.
I check this site a few times a day and maybe once over the weekend. I'm always willing to chat. In the texting/social media world we live in today it's sometimes easier to meet up online than in person or over the phone. This is a great place to be heard. For me, even if I only get a glimpse of your life and your struggle I feel at least a little emotionally invested. You matter, your story matters. Just know that.
I don't gamble because I can't anymore. I don't want to. It's never created any true happiness for me. Stay strong. Do what works for you. This recovery isn't about judgement, it's about getting better.