Gambling Addiction & Recovery Support Group
Compulsive gambling is an urge or addiction to gamble despite harmful negative consequences or a desire to stop. A preferred term among many professionals is problem gambling, as few people described by the term experience true compulsions in the clinical sense of the word. Problem gambling often is defined by whether harm is experienced by the gambler or others rather...
I am learning more and more that overcoming gambling addiction is far more complicated than just telling yourself that you just won't go to the casio. That worked for 5 days and then I was back, thinking I would just spend a little and then walk or maybe I would win walk, after all, I should be stronger now that I admitted I have a problem. Yeah right!
I went to the casino on Friday night, I actually won and left and thought to myself that I had a victory, I have surely beaten this demon. I went back yesterday because, after all, I had won. Well, like so many times before I gave it all back and I am feeling more guilty and mad at myself than ever.
I ask myself all the time, why can't I just stay away? Just don't drive there, don't go that direction, don't even temp yourself.!! Somehow, I get this little thought in my head and I can't stop thinking about it and I start to rationalize and dream about winning my money back..but that never happens!
So I am at day one again. I feel like I am learning more and more about this addiction. I don't think I took the word "addiction" seriously at first. I think I thought that I could just not go and I would be cured. I am now seeing that it is more than that and I really need to focus qutting daily and "staying clean" like someone who is addicted to alcohol or drugs!
Thanks for your support and encouragements. I love knowing that am not alone!
Still Hopeful :)
I went to the casino on Friday night, I actually won and left and thought to myself that I had a victory, I have surely beaten this demon. I went back yesterday because, after all, I had won. Well, like so many times before I gave it all back and I am feeling more guilty and mad at myself than ever.
I ask myself all the time, why can't I just stay away? Just don't drive there, don't go that direction, don't even temp yourself.!! Somehow, I get this little thought in my head and I can't stop thinking about it and I start to rationalize and dream about winning my money back..but that never happens!
So I am at day one again. I feel like I am learning more and more about this addiction. I don't think I took the word "addiction" seriously at first. I think I thought that I could just not go and I would be cured. I am now seeing that it is more than that and I really need to focus qutting daily and "staying clean" like someone who is addicted to alcohol or drugs!
Thanks for your support and encouragements. I love knowing that am not alone!
Still Hopeful :)
I had my second visit with a psychologist today (who I am seeing about a relationship issue and not gambling), and I brought up my gambling addiction. Even though I haven't been to a casino for around 9 months, I still think about going, especially with the 4th of July holiday weekend coming up. Long holiday weekends are a gambling trigger for me. She explained how, with addiction, something happens to the brain over time when you repeat a certain behavior, somewhat like developing a "groove" in the brain. The addict will usually fall back into that groove of abnormal behavior (for me, gambling higher stakes and way beyond my limits in terms of both time and money), so once an addict, you just can't do it any more. She of course talked about needing to find other things to do that make you just as happy, but aren't as damaging.
As mentioned before, I didn't have the strength to stay away from the casinos on my own willpower (that little monster voice in your head will always find a way to rationalize how it's ok to go just once), and found self-banning helpful. You have to be pretty serious about quitting to take that step, though. Maybe just self-ban from the nearest places, so that you have to give a longer trip some serious thought, the next time you get the gambling urge.