Gambling Addiction & Recovery Support Group
Compulsive gambling is an urge or addiction to gamble despite harmful negative consequences or a desire to stop. A preferred term among many professionals is problem gambling, as few people described by the term experience true compulsions in the clinical sense of the word. Problem gambling often is defined by whether harm is experienced by the gambler or others rather...
I wanted to get anyone's opinion on slot machine games on line that are free to play. I caught husband playing one and it totally offended me. He said it is technically not gambling....! Is this safe or a temptation?????
Hi Rachel!! Love ya, E
Concentrate on yourself, Rachel. On what you need this very hour for you to make some positive in your recovery, your life. It takes a lot concentration and effort, and of course with outside (from other people around you) distraction, its not that easy. But again, if you ask yourself a question.. who is drawing your attention to that distraction, other than mainly yourself?
You are doing really good, even though it may sound odd, considering your current situation. But just at least for two minutes out of your day let yourself to get that realization in your mind - you are doing good.
We are all in this together, one day at a time.
Im with you, Vicky.
For me? Definitely a slippery slope! After I left Las Vegas and returned to NJ, I was on salary for a year with my company as they were gracious enough to allow me to work on projects from home. I was spending a great deal of time on the computer, rewriting policies, procedures, as well as a regionalized employee handbook.
One day, I saw an ad for free play video poker at an online gambling site. I thought "No harm, no foul", right? Wrong! Before long, I was depositing money and playing the real deal...all in secrecy, mind you. Waking up in the middle of the night, getting on line, and simply throwing hundreds of dollars a week down the tube.
I am so embarrassed to put this out here, but here goes.....the truth. Five or six months into my on-line gambling frenzy, I caught a Royal for about $1,300, playing quarters. Feeling lucky, I decided to up my bet to $5/hand, and hit another Royal for 25k. But because i was a closet gambler (significant other had know idea I was playing for real money), I could not cash it out, without telling him I was gambling. Even if I could have cashed out and stashed it somewhere, I had no idea what tax implications there would be with, besides all of the correspondence would be through the US mail, so it would still require disclosure to him.
So, I did what I did best....I left it in there and gambled the entire thing away, in a matter of 2or 3 months! I am sick to my stomach just typing this reply-thinking about how freaking stupid my thought process was. I have forgiven myself, because I do understand that I was just one sick puppy while in the active stage if my addiction.
But I also understand, that any temptation to "return to the scene" , free or otherwise, will most assuredly lead me down the path to mass destructive behavior....the movie, Forrest Gump, has a wonderful quote of "Stupid is, as stupid does"....well, this time around, knowing what I know now, stupid is what I would be to invite this temptation upon myself! But this is just me.
...nu uh....just ain't doing that anymore!
Thanks for listening, and I hope my details didn't serve as further triggers for anyone. My apologies if they did....I just needed to share this awful memory with you, because I trust you to understand!
Love Tagg
Even though I am still failing of trying to be completed Gambling FREE but I have to settle for less which is a NO No for most GA group, if this is the only way I can survive.