Gambling Addiction & Recovery Support Group
Compulsive gambling is an urge or addiction to gamble despite harmful negative consequences or a desire to stop. A preferred term among many professionals is problem gambling, as few people described by the term experience true compulsions in the clinical sense of the word. Problem gambling often is defined by whether harm is experienced by the gambler or others rather...
Jan 5th was my first day and I am building on that (per advice from a gentleman in GA with ove 20 years). The day before after finally leaving the casino, I felt soooo alone, I had no friends, no money, no self respect, had lost a client I had for years.
It was the worst feeling its hard to describe, but that is what I choose to remember whenever I have thoughts of the casino, which I don't have hardly at all anymore. That night I also (by divine intervention) broke through the extremely thick wall of DENIAL and resistance I had for over 15 years.
From what I observed about myself I really saw that I was addicted to gambling and could and would not ever be able to control it but I could arrest it with a lot of diligent work When I looked at my cell phone after I got home that night I had a voicemail and text from a GA member I had spoke to in quite a while and she was asking if I was OK and to call her and I did and told her EVERYTHING! ( i ws crying all the way through that phone call)
In the past I could never take anyone's suggestions. It had to be MY way (the addicts way), but I Took her suggestion ( swallowed my so called PRIDE) and went to a GA meeting the next day and have not looked back. I took another suggestion and got one on one counseling and also group counseling as well as attending GA meetings. I also have a wise Sponsor who I have been calling everyday.
I am doing the work and trusting and having faith in the healing power of these meetings and placing principles (the purpose of why I am there) before personalities ( RE: if i don't like what is said by someone in the meetings or group) ( Before when I was a chronic relapser and ONLY THE ADDICT WAS ALIVE in me, GA meetings seemed to be just a trigger for me to go gambling. That is not the case now. I see things through the eyes of my true self and not the addict which I am so grateful for!!!!
I was finally able to break the fusion I had with the addict in me and now I can really see how insidious and powerful and very clever this addict is, so when the say in GA it will take diligent effort on my part to arrest this addiction, they weren't kidding. For me my addict comes in the form of needing drama and all of the negative situations and people that go with it. It loves to be resisted because it wins everytime when that happens. It happens this way with all addictions in my opinion and my own observation
. That night I was granted the serenity to ACCEPT that I cannot change the hard core fact that I will always have this addiction/illness and that I cannot change it but I can recover and NOW I am facing everything and recovering NOW due to the above work that I am doing and I have a new job, handled the IRS, have many loving friends (myself too), sticking to my budget and paying bills and debts. The fog is really lifting!!!!
Excuse my long discussion of this, but I hope it may help. I unconditionally love you all for being at this site and listening
It was the worst feeling its hard to describe, but that is what I choose to remember whenever I have thoughts of the casino, which I don't have hardly at all anymore. That night I also (by divine intervention) broke through the extremely thick wall of DENIAL and resistance I had for over 15 years.
From what I observed about myself I really saw that I was addicted to gambling and could and would not ever be able to control it but I could arrest it with a lot of diligent work When I looked at my cell phone after I got home that night I had a voicemail and text from a GA member I had spoke to in quite a while and she was asking if I was OK and to call her and I did and told her EVERYTHING! ( i ws crying all the way through that phone call)
In the past I could never take anyone's suggestions. It had to be MY way (the addicts way), but I Took her suggestion ( swallowed my so called PRIDE) and went to a GA meeting the next day and have not looked back. I took another suggestion and got one on one counseling and also group counseling as well as attending GA meetings. I also have a wise Sponsor who I have been calling everyday.
I am doing the work and trusting and having faith in the healing power of these meetings and placing principles (the purpose of why I am there) before personalities ( RE: if i don't like what is said by someone in the meetings or group) ( Before when I was a chronic relapser and ONLY THE ADDICT WAS ALIVE in me, GA meetings seemed to be just a trigger for me to go gambling. That is not the case now. I see things through the eyes of my true self and not the addict which I am so grateful for!!!!
I was finally able to break the fusion I had with the addict in me and now I can really see how insidious and powerful and very clever this addict is, so when the say in GA it will take diligent effort on my part to arrest this addiction, they weren't kidding. For me my addict comes in the form of needing drama and all of the negative situations and people that go with it. It loves to be resisted because it wins everytime when that happens. It happens this way with all addictions in my opinion and my own observation
. That night I was granted the serenity to ACCEPT that I cannot change the hard core fact that I will always have this addiction/illness and that I cannot change it but I can recover and NOW I am facing everything and recovering NOW due to the above work that I am doing and I have a new job, handled the IRS, have many loving friends (myself too), sticking to my budget and paying bills and debts. The fog is really lifting!!!!
Excuse my long discussion of this, but I hope it may help. I unconditionally love you all for being at this site and listening
penny
It does help to know that there is another bit of unconditional love. Back at Ya!