Gambling Addiction & Recovery Support Group
Compulsive gambling is an urge or addiction to gamble despite harmful negative consequences or a desire to stop. A preferred term among many professionals is problem gambling, as few people described by the term experience true compulsions in the clinical sense of the word. Problem gambling often is defined by whether harm is experienced by the gambler or others rather...
Hello, new member. Thanks to all who post and manage this site. Reading all of your stories really helps.
I am feeling the urge to gamble when I get out of work tonight. Last I gambled Tuesday, 2/19. Not that long ago. I lost of course.
After leaving the casino Tuesday there is an Indian gaming casino 30 minutes from my house I swore I would never come back. The day after, I still held that feeling. Now, the urge is back. This is a typical pattern for me.
It is a love / hate relationship. I love walking into a casino, seeing all of the machines light up and feeling the thrill of potentially hitting the big one. I love finding my favorite slot with its cozy chair; feeling the rush of potentially winning, lighting up a cigarette, spiking my drink with vodka (no alcohol served) and start playing. I love the feeling when I win, even if its a small amount. I love that rush. It is both relaxing and thrilling if that makes sense.
I hate when I start to loose, when I see my credits dwindling down below the minimum bet. Then bam, zero credits! A combination of hope and anxiety flows through me as I walk toward the ATM to pull more money out. I pull out money and look at my statement and see that I am nigh out of money. I have just pulled out 90% of what I had in my bank. Crap, I am going to be broke until I get paid next week. Oh wellI head back to the machines and an hour later. I am back to 0 credits.
Anyway, after Ive lost all my money, I gather my belongings and sadly walk out of the casino. I now really hate myself. I really feelings us gamblers / addicts describe after this high. Now I hate gambling. I swear I will never go back.
This is about 95% of my experience when I gamble at the casinos. On occasion I actually win it back and then some, but of course I throw it back in the machine hoping to hit the big jackpot.
I hate gamblging because I normally dont smoke, especially in large volumes. When I gamble I smoke 10 xs the amount I would in a month. Not only is smoking bad for me in general but it is not helping me become a better roller derby player and I am not getting any younger. I am 36 years old.
Also, I am trying to save my money so I can get the fu$k out of here and move back to Austin. Fortunately, there is no casino near Austin.. I used to live in Las Vegas (when I really became an addict), but I moved because of it. I moved to the East coast from Las Vegas, and fortunately, there was no casino near me. I did not gamble once. I had no desire to.
Since Ive had to move back to California where my father lives (long story), I have gotten addicted again. I would like to blame it on the fact that the casino is only 30 minutes away, but are they really to blame?
Back to right the moment, I want to go play. After all the reasons why I should not, the urge is always wins.
Thanks for reading. Your support and relatable stories are greatly appreciated.
I am feeling the urge to gamble when I get out of work tonight. Last I gambled Tuesday, 2/19. Not that long ago. I lost of course.
After leaving the casino Tuesday there is an Indian gaming casino 30 minutes from my house I swore I would never come back. The day after, I still held that feeling. Now, the urge is back. This is a typical pattern for me.
It is a love / hate relationship. I love walking into a casino, seeing all of the machines light up and feeling the thrill of potentially hitting the big one. I love finding my favorite slot with its cozy chair; feeling the rush of potentially winning, lighting up a cigarette, spiking my drink with vodka (no alcohol served) and start playing. I love the feeling when I win, even if its a small amount. I love that rush. It is both relaxing and thrilling if that makes sense.
I hate when I start to loose, when I see my credits dwindling down below the minimum bet. Then bam, zero credits! A combination of hope and anxiety flows through me as I walk toward the ATM to pull more money out. I pull out money and look at my statement and see that I am nigh out of money. I have just pulled out 90% of what I had in my bank. Crap, I am going to be broke until I get paid next week. Oh wellI head back to the machines and an hour later. I am back to 0 credits.
Anyway, after Ive lost all my money, I gather my belongings and sadly walk out of the casino. I now really hate myself. I really feelings us gamblers / addicts describe after this high. Now I hate gambling. I swear I will never go back.
This is about 95% of my experience when I gamble at the casinos. On occasion I actually win it back and then some, but of course I throw it back in the machine hoping to hit the big jackpot.
I hate gamblging because I normally dont smoke, especially in large volumes. When I gamble I smoke 10 xs the amount I would in a month. Not only is smoking bad for me in general but it is not helping me become a better roller derby player and I am not getting any younger. I am 36 years old.
Also, I am trying to save my money so I can get the fu$k out of here and move back to Austin. Fortunately, there is no casino near Austin.. I used to live in Las Vegas (when I really became an addict), but I moved because of it. I moved to the East coast from Las Vegas, and fortunately, there was no casino near me. I did not gamble once. I had no desire to.
Since Ive had to move back to California where my father lives (long story), I have gotten addicted again. I would like to blame it on the fact that the casino is only 30 minutes away, but are they really to blame?
Back to right the moment, I want to go play. After all the reasons why I should not, the urge is always wins.
Thanks for reading. Your support and relatable stories are greatly appreciated.
I can walk into the casino with $500, get down to $100 and win $200 and feel like I'm a huge winner. Ummm.. really?? Still down $200, but I don't see it that way while I'm there. I'm $500 ahead when I walk in the door. If I kept on walking I'd stay $500 ahead!
My father said something to me on my 21st birthday when he took me to Reno for a fun trip. He said "money isn't money in a casino, it's a toy. Don't forget that when you leave that casino it's money again. That money buys food, gas, pays your bills." It makes a lot of sense. There is a face cream that I love but I refuse to pay $100 for it.. but I think nothing of wasting $100 on one slot machine in 30 minutes. Where is the logic in that? It's because when we're inside the casino it's a toy. You totally forget what that same amount of money can do outside of those four walls. Look right now at the money in your wallet that you would take into that casino this afternoon and think of what it could buy for you right now. Would it pay a bill? Let you get a pedicure? Buy you a nice dinner out with your husband? Think of it as money for a moment instead of a toy... whatever you elect to do with that money this afternoon will be more beneficial to you than giving it to the casino. Food for thought.
Cookie
Hugs..Lisa
I'm new to this site, too, and have not bet in about 3 months. I've been going to 2 meetings/week at GA and that's helped enormously. So much so that I feel an obligation to keep going. I urge you to at least pop on this site whenever you feel the urge missim and think of how you describe the feeling you get when walking out of the casino- that's the feeling you will always have when you gamble- you can't win and even if you did, you'd give it all back.
Stupid me did go to casino right after I left work. I did not even stop home to read your healing comments. Just reading them now. Although I came out a few hundred ahead, I believe I am still at a financial loss and smoked way too much. There is a GA here in town but, but I have no excuse. Meeting was last night. Should have went there instead of casino. I gotta keep fighting. Thank God for this site and all of you.
Also, congrats to those whom have not gambled! You are inspiring.
You really need to get to GA or send someone here a message if you get the urge to go. It's not easy, believe me I know. I've been gambling my whole adult life and feel like a new man since I stopped. No more worrying about how to find money to gamble with, pay bills with, how to cover it up and the list could go on and on...