So good to hear from you and that you have gotten into your fitness. I recently reached my year and have been slacking on checking in and posting due to my extracurricular activities. But I will say that the lifestyle change with working out and dieting has made me somewhat competitive in a bad way. Almost like when I was gambling - I feel the need to win. My husband decided he wanted us to get our fitness on to help us both be better at the other sports we do such as whitewater kayaking and biking. But when he loses more weight or sticks to the eating plan and I fall off the wagon, I get super pissed. Sames goes for my friend at work - if I am not ahead in the amount of weight I lost or I am not "beating" her with my goals I get jealous. It is like this weird new obsession. So I have to try to let it go and focus on doing it for me instead of making it a competition. I swear I was never this competitive. LOL! However, I guess this kind of focus takes the focus away from gambling.....but today I decided to have a "me day" and do girlie stuff that I never do like get manicures, go get a fake tan, get my hair done, pay for full service car wash and go to see a chic flick at movie by myself. I am trying to do normal people things outside of kayaking and working out to stay balanced. Then maybe I can alleviate obsessing about one thing. I hear working out can become addictive too ;-) Anyway, glad you found that distraction and have hit 4 months. Keep up good work. Oh and I dropped 15 lbs and need to lose 10 more but I am stuck. We have cut out processed sugar and fatty food as well as alcohol. I now have added 2 tbsp apple cidar vinegar to my juice in the morning and that seems to give my metabolism a boost. It is gross as hell but it is natural and has a lot of other health benefits ;-)

Gamblers are very competitive. We hate to lose, I think that is why we will keep playing in hopes to get our money back or finally "Win" and be ahead. I guess it moves to other aspects of our life. I hear ya completely, I am very competitive about getting fit again. I have a group of friends and I hated being the "big guy". I became the big guy because I would sit and gamble for 8-10 hours DAILY and then eat junk food cause it was cheap or conveienent or I lost a lot of money and needed the bad carbs...

I saw a show on NetFlix called "Fed Up". It changed my whole view on anything processed, sugar, and soda. I will never drink another soda again after watching that show, it is a nutrition ticking time bomb. Sugar is the same way, but I give myself 1 cheat meal a week to stay sane and I will eat a little sugar.

If you have netflix, take a look at that documentary, it will be life changing and very informational.

Congrats on 1 year also! Sounds like you are over the dreaded hump. How often do you get the urge to gamble? Also, it sounds like you have the necessary support in order around you to help?

It is crazy how you mention "normal people", I was thinking about that the other day. So many things I used to be so frugile about because I didn't want to lose extra $$ for gambling. Now I look back and ask myself WHY WHY WHY did I live in that tunnel vision/nightmare and why didn't I wake up? It was because I was scared. I was at rock bottom when I decided to stop.

For the people visiting this site - YOU CAN DO IT. I gambled $10,000's away yearly for 10 years and I have stayed away for four solid months. Commit to yourself.

If you wake up everyday and not think about the past mistakes or worry about all the future bills, but instead say "Today, I will be perfect. I will not gamble. I will put my mind to ease of the past. I will work towards a perfect future." This will help, it sounds corny as heck, until you see it works.

Glad to see you are doing good Naynee, keep in contact!!

God Bless everyone else, stay gamble free!!!

jmnewco - I think some people think that the money aspect of the addiction will solve all their problems, but what I realized is that for me the addiction wasn't about the money because no amount of "winnings" was going to make me quit. Have you see the Gambler yet? It's the same concept. He wasn't gambling for the win - he was just gambling to throw away money - he even said (after his mom gave him the money to clear his debt) something along the lines of let's see how fast we can get rid of it. Then he proceeded to gamble away $260,000 in a matter of hours. He had internal issues eating at him that caused him to do what he did - even to the point of willing to be killed and letting the people he was in debt to kill his family. He didn't care. He didn't care about the money. It is a weird sickness. I know in GA, they say you don't need to know the "why" of your gambling problem, you just need to stop. I disagree. Some people's brains are wired different. I need to know why in order to help me figure out a way to quit - so I went to a therapist, watched documentaries, etc. I still think to this day if I could win money to pay for a house, it would be awesome, but I suppose I will just work and do it the hard way! I hope I can stay healthy, happy and married and move on to a happier life. Oh and urges have come. My husband buys the lotto tickets - that has never done it for me, but I have bought a couple to try to sway away the urge. It doesn't do it - there is "high" effect when someone like me gets from sitting in a casino playing hours upon hours at a machine. Walking into a store for a lotto ticket does not produce the same high or escape from reality that the casino did, so finding an alternative to the urge to play machines by another form of gambling isn't the answer. However, I don't tell my husband not to. He doesn't have the problem. I do. But I did try and it isn't my thing. However, I feel if I were to continue playing lotto as an alternative, it would just piss me off and make me want to go to the casino even more, so I just buy things for me such as clothes or spa treatments or things like that (in moderation of course).

Taking up the dieting/exercising has been consuming my time, but I have to try not to let it affect my friendships and turn me into a competitive mean bully. Also, I got a fitbit and have been consumed with it. I don't know if that is a good or bad thing.....anyway, we did finally pull the trigger on buying a new house and that has gotten us both stressed. Hopefully, once we get moved in, doing things around the house will occupy some time as well. My two friends in GA have been so busy and consumed with things going on in their lives, I feel really bad. One gal is getting an MBA and I went through that already. When you work full time and go to grad school at night, you have no life! I feel for her, but it keeps her out of the casino world! Anyway, good luck to you on your fitness. I have 10 lbs to go in my goal! I am struggling with the last 10. It is summer time and I like to drink my fancy beers ;-)

Great post. I had been gamble free for over a year, fell back in the spiral. The good news is I knew that being gamble free gave me a better life, I didn't have to worry about "saving money" for my habit and I could enjoy spending money on things that brought much more joy. I am only on day 10 gamble free this round and need all the reminders of stories like yours. Just for today I will not gamble - Stay strong.

Backinblack - congrats on the no 10 days and counting!!! You can do it my friend, just remember, you have to concentrate on staying perfect for THIS DAY. Don't overwhelm yourself for the long-term until you get that momentum going.

Naynee - I would say I would race you to the fitness goal, but not sure if that would be the best thing haha!! I am the same way, lotto tickets do not do it for me. I like skill games of poker and blackjack. High frequency of changes in money. I have started investing again (Day trading) mainly. I feel this is pretty much the same thing, should I be worried?

Also, congrats on the house. Part of my career is in the mortgage industry. Hopefully the underwriting process is quick and painless, if not I can probably help if you need it.