My husband and I have been caring for my two nephews and neice since January, prior to that they spent about 10 months with their grandmother. Plan still stands as reunification despite what seems like little progress by parents. There is a very estranged and distant relationship between the parents and us, however we do our best to cover that up for the kids. We've had a great, trusting and trying relationship with the kids and we are in a good groove with them however over the last month and a half or so when the parents learned that a request for change in plan from reunification with parents to custody and guardianship with us there is has been a drastic change with the older kids (16 and 11) and their relationship with us. What once were two kids who really grew into their role as advocates for themselves suddenly became two kids who shut down and stop sharing most if not everything about them- not just things with their parents but in general building lots of tension in the home. 

I'm frustrated and feel like we've made so much progress and now there's so much regression, i'm feeling like we failed them now that they are no longer advocating for their long term wellbeing and instead insist that they want things to go back to how they were. I know they don't mean it fully being that what life once was obviously was not all peaches and roses given their current situation but I can't feel like maybe we've failed somewhere along the line.

I feel hurt and although I know this isn't about me or my husband, let's be real here- we all invest so much of ourselves so selflessly 99% of the time but that doesn't mean feelings don't get hurt when there's a sense of rejection. 

Not sure what i'm looking for to be honest, maybe a sense of understanding/empathy or who knows- maybe someone to tell me to get over it. BTW, i'm pregnant with our first child, we are both under 30 and this has all been a lot to take in but as the 'final hearing' approaches, I realize how much harder it might be to let go.