Food Addiction Support Group
An individual suffering from a food addiction disorder frequently experiences episodes of uncontrolled eating, or binging, during which they may feel frenzied or out of control. They will eat much more quickly than is normal, and continue to eat even past the point of being uncomfortably full. Binging in this way is generally followed by a period of intense guilt feelings...
There must be a reinforcing factor to our addiction or we just wouldn't do it. I know it must serve me in some way to binge and I am trying to understand what that is. I started comfort eating last year as a reaction to a break up and now it has got to be a really bad habit again. Personally I think it 'knocks me out' of life, in that when I'm thinking about food and eating I zone out and don't need to deal with my feelings. Also I think it's a bit of rebellion with me to the body facists and all the obsession with the sizes of celebrities, it's so damn boring!
On the one side, I want to get better, I want someone to notice me, I want someone to love me, but the second I get close to it, the moment I lose weight and people start to compliment me, people start noticing, and I panic. I panic and I start eating.
It's been subconscious until recently, but knowing why doens't make it any less scary. I've lost 60 pounds this past year and while I still have another 50 to lose before I hit my "goal" it's already starting and I've noticed my weight loss has slowed. Okay, it's stopped.
Knowing why and getting over it are two different beasts. And I have no idea how to beat it.