I know that feeling of screming with the feeling of being in a dark tunnel..getting out of bed and might as well have stayed in it because it seemed the harder I tried to anchor te boat in the storm the more it felt like I was sinking..I ha a friend say things will ge better..you dont see this..its like you are in one nightmare of a storm and its never going to end..I sat in front of my doctor and burst out into tears.was doing my list..my friend had died..income for household was gone..debts and being hounded..just diagnosed with a conditon which I wouldnt wish on my worse enemy..no food.kind of looking bleak as this guy was on phone about to take my house..some stranger on the end of the phone who peobably as getting a bonus for everyone he called in..It felt the last straw..couldnt afford petrol.I cut this ass guy off and the phone rang again..I thought it was him..I said I have nothing left and I feel like walking out the door and ending it..it was not the same guy lucky for me..I got so angry I had worked so hard never did any wrong to anyone..then something inside me thought some of it was my fault some of it not..I was going to ge through that storm..I still had many knocks..I would fill up many boxes if I wrote it all..did the tide turn a little yes..

Hi Anne... welcome to the group...

I have worked myself out of debt and did it through a series of moves to help accomplish this feat. What I say is how I did it. It may not work for you or you may say it's rubbish but it can be done... all I'm saying is how I did it, no advice in anyway... just something to think about...

First, I sat down and looked at my expenses. There was only so much I could do with income but expenses I could have some control over. The first year I started my program I eliminated $9,000 from my budget.

Second, I made a priority list. Things that no matter what I couldn't fall behind on... which ended up being three things. Rent, food, and utilities. I needed this to stay functional in society. Utilities didn't include internet or cable TV. To me they were luxuries and not necessities. I'm not a diabetic, so even food took a back seat for awhile...

Until I was out of debt, I quit using credit cards entirely. And then the hard part. Making a list bills that didn't have to be paid right now. FOR ME, again just ME, if I had the debts you shared, for now I'd forget about the loan on the old truck. What can they do? Repo it? Let them. Eventually, I'd pay for it but right now it's survival mode time.

Doing this my credit rating took a major hit, but I did work myself out of debt. And my rating in the four plus years since it happened has bounced back and is now at 717.

Anyway, I hope you're able to find a new job and things settle down for you

Hang in there Anne. Don't let you and your partner become yet another statistic of Post 9/11 America.

I'm from Northern Ireland and am a Full Time Carer for my 88 Year-Old Grandmother. She is able bodied, but she requires me for driving her to town for Shopping and other errands. It can be a thankless task, even at the best of times, but I have put so much time and effort into ensuring my finances are under control I deserve a medal.

I also have a younger Brother who I have to take to his College for a course in Computer Programming and I do a Course in Text Processing every Thursday Morning in order to make myself more employable. Think getting a job in America is difficult, wait until you see what it's like in this Country.

First, as Messenger said, examine your expenses and cut out the more exuberant ones. Also find ways of increasing revenue, not just finding work but also things like 'Yard Sales'. (We don't have them in UK/Ireland, we have 'Car Boot Sales' instead)

Hope you can get through this.

thank you all for your advice. yeah we have started to cut out we can. and you are right, the old truck loan can wait. if they want to repo it we sold it to a junk yard. lol. luckily my rent includes all utilities internet and cable. need the phone otherwise would never find new job.. had an interview today and waiting to hear from another place as well. so we will see what happens.but i can cut my services down on my phone. yeah a few things we can cut and hoepfully survive .as for yard sales.. well that wont happen any time soon. I live in northern ontario canada and its too darn cold out but maybe in the spring.

gosh this is so hard to say but thinking of doing bankruptcy might be smart....

food pantry may help you with some food too showing unemployment will help get them to give you food....hugs bill

I'm sorry but running to bankruptcy because of self-inflicted wounds is wrong in my opinion. Bankruptcy was meant to help those with medical issues, small business owners and things like that.

Just spending money with the idea that bankruptcy is a safe haven is why some folks get very bitter with those who spend foolishly...

I don't know your whole situation but I admire your effort to clear it up.

One thing that always kept my head straight was the fact that no matter how broke I was, I still had my word. I made promises to the creditors. Some were unforeseen expenses (medical) but a bunch were credit card debts. To me, those debts I gave my word on that I would pay and I did.

Sorry if I sound like I'm preaching but at times the topic of bankruptcy sets me off. People run to it because they have no self-control and expects everyone else to pick up the pieces, with higher interest loans and a major lack of trust between the consumer and a business...

I apologize Anne, my comments were not directed specifically at you. By what you have said, you don't spend money recklessly and are trying to make it work...

Wishing you the best