Fibromyalgia Support Group

You're not alone in your pain. Fibromyalgia is a condition that can be difficult to diagnose and manage. If you're trying to cope with pain throughout your body, sleep problems, general fatigue, or other common fibromyalgia symptoms, you're in the right place. The community is here for you to talk about therapies and share your challenges.

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kimberh 03/03/2016

In my opinion, people with Fibromyalgia are the strongest people on Earth. Through constant pain, constant fatigue, depression and a myriad of other complications, we manage to be decent, even happy people when dealing with others. We push past all that we have to deal with and actually try to make others feel at ease around us. We often take on more than our bodies and minds can handle so that we can work or spend time with family and friends. We limit how much we complain so that others feel comfortable around us and don't have to bear the weight of our situation. We encourage one another and are extremely sympathetic to each other. We do all this while battling with doctors who can't or sometimes won't help, enduring the judgement of coworkers who have no idea what it takes just to make it through the day and while facing the doubtful looks of family and friends who don't believe it is as bad as we say. In the words of Maya Angelo, "And still we rise!" Others may not realize it, but we are the strongest people on Earth!

mnfibro 03/03/2016

Well said Kimber,
I kind of understand why people don't understand our pain though. I keep thinking back on my brother having a gout attack many years ago. We were suppose to go to a Twins game and he was laying there saying that he just can't make it because of the pain. I could see his toe, which was a little swollen and of course being the good brother that I was made comments about him having just a little "toe" pain. Suck it up! Be a man! Well, about 10 years later I got gout...and it gets so painful that a breeze across your toe makes you ache! I gave him crap because I didn't understand...couldn't see it so it must not be there type of thing. I was wrong.

That all being said, I'm so sore today I would guarantee that a few years ago I would not be at work right now. For good or for bad, pain is so much part of our lives now that, unless it's a flare, we blow it off and move forward. I'm babbling now..sorry. :-)

Shakota6 03/03/2016

Very good points Kimberh.

I remember that after I got fibro, I started looking at handicapped in wheelchairs as people. I looked at their faces and I smiled at them. Before, they were just people-in-wheelchairs.

Nobody notices our heroics.

kimberh 03/04/2016

Kel, I understand what you mean. You are not babbling. :) Sometimes it takes going through something ourselves to truly realize what others are going through. Strangely enough, I have a co-worker who was injured in the Gulf War. He has had mid-section reconstruction a few times and he lives with chronic pain like we do. Our fellow co-workers "understand" his pain and are sympathetic. My pain on the other hand just isn't that clear to them. So I get sly comments about "working from home again" and such. This morning it literally took me a 1/2 hour to get out of bed after the alarm clock went off. I was so fatigued and the pain was killer. That is what they will never appreciate about what we go through. Anyway, I am the one babbling now. LOL!

Kimber

kimberh 03/04/2016

Shakota, you make a good point. I believe the same has happened for me. Handicapped people are just people. They/we just need tools like wheelchairs, walkers, canes and such to help us continue some form of a normal life. Also, when anyone tells me they are in pain, I have total sympathy.

LeoX3 03/04/2016

We're proof that mind over matter must have merit, or we wouldn't be out of bed and typing these replies;-) Seriously, however, I was raised to view pain as a legit complaint (unless it was mine) and what with one thing and another, never saw people with canes or wheelchairs, etc., as anything but just people.... That'd be my mom-the-nurse at work... But after Fibro? I realllllly appreciated more what it takes for anyone to "suck it up" day in and day out. Sure, my dad's why my kneecap broke and stayed that way when I was a kid, but it healed. Fibro? Not so much.

Here's to the true grit club:-) *clink*

beclinkay 03/04/2016

I know of no other illness, besides Fibromyalgia, where you have to convince people that you are sick. I think that is part of what gives us strength. So many of us, go it alone, because we are not believed, so we suffer in silence.

I admit that I don't have too many people anymore that don't think there is at least something to having fibro. And my family is very supportive. I do have a lady at stamping class that has RA, and she doesn't think my fibro is such a big deal. She also says that I need to push through the pain like she does. She stays busy everyday, running all over. I have no idea how she does it. I never could.

I know there are diseases much worse than mine, but I also know that we don't get the recognition that others who are sick, get.

bluesun 03/04/2016

I agree with all of you.

Especially what Ida said. I don't know of any other illness either where you have to convince people (including doctors) that you are sick. It gets exhausting.

basketballmom23 03/04/2016

I have never been a mean person, but I know I used to judge people. How come they have a handicap permit? There is nothing wrong with them. Well, along comes fibro and I have become a better person for it. I don't judge people. I don't know their story. They look fine, but so do I. This has also been a good lesson for my kids. I am so sorry it took getting fibro to realize this. However, there is one person I know who has MS and whines on FB about it constantly saying this is numb, that is burning, etc., but yet she does crossfit, run's 5k's, mud runs and most recently pole dancing in 3" heels. I guess I am very jealous of her because the thought of doing any of those things at this point is so beyond anything I can comprehend. Sorry for rambling about that. It just frustrates me to no end.

tyzz27 03/04/2016

I just want to thank everyone for sharing. Upon hearing the constant replies that very few people believe we are sick really resonates with me this week. I went and saw someone at the pain clinic at the local hospital this week and because I was not in pain when he did the pressure point test he did not believe I was in pain. I explained all the symptoms to him and he practically looked at me as though I was lying. To me he looked as though he was a surgeon and because I wasnt someone with a surgical problem who he could fix he didnt want to know me. Anyway thanks again for your honest responses.

scootermom 03/04/2016

You are right on, a surgeon likes to cut things, nothing else interests them. One day I told my doctor that FM/CF is worse than cancer. Because for cancer treatment there's surgery or chemo, and then you are cured.( or not) Of course I didn't wish I had cancer, but you get my frustration.

The parking stalls at the mall have special spots for handicapped, mothers of small children, heck even expectant mothers!

How about a spot for a 55 year old mother of three with severe fibromyalgia?

No, I'll pass. I will walk the extra 30 feet. Slowly.

Abotsd 03/05/2016

I think/know, I've been too stoic. So much extra pain these last four months. Finally, my pain dr. noticed that it still hurt, (my pulled groin muscle), and he sent me to a physical therapist. I did not want to go. It is in a new place for me to drive to. And I've gotten so lost at times, I am afraid of getting lost again.

Found the place after a while, and am feeling so much better. Thank G-d my pain dr. thought to send me. Who knew that this pain from my left knee up to my private areas, could be treated! Feeling much better now.

kimberh 03/07/2016

I recently saw an article that said that the quality of life for someone with FMS is less than someone with rheumatoid arthritis. My mother-in-law had debilitating rheumatoid arthritis so there is no question in my mind that it is a very serious condition. The difference though is that her pain was recognized. People never hesitated to assist her because they rightly believed she was in pain.

Being believed, I think, would go a long way towards better treatment and perhaps even a cure for FMS in the future. Right now, they throw anti-depressants at us and hope we shut up and go away. At least I can say that my rheumatologist acknowledges that there is something to FMS and she seems to care about how I am feeling. I just hope that research continues so that we can get the help we need.

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